"It's Everyday Bro" by Jake Paul
“Yah. Y’all can’t handle this…”
The obnoxious, GODawful beat to “It’s Everyday Bro” hits and the crowd immediately launches into a chorus of boos. Johnny Dorn walks out from the back with a gigantic shit-eating grin on his face and takes his time getting to the ring, making sure everyone’s eardrums are assaulted by his theme music for as long as humanly possible. He hops onto the apron, wipes his feet on the outside, then slips between the ropes before ascending a turnbuckle to pose and jawjack with the fans a bit before the match starts.
Finisher: Shot of Malört
Description: Ace Crusher
- "Peter Francis Geraci" (straightjacket neckbreaker slam aka Sasha Banks' "Bankrupt")
- Double arm DDT
- Scoop slam piledriver
- German suplex
- Knife edge chops
- Low blow
- Eye gouge
About the Wrestler
Johnny Dorn is a relative rookie to pro wrestling. He had a very short stint in Red Line Wrestling, run out of DePaul University’s athletic center, a few years back but the company didn’t last long. He currently competes in Cheap Pops Pro Wrestling, where he is somehow 2-1 despite his minimal experience and the fact that he’s kind of a dumbass.
What he lacks in training and experience he makes up for in cunning, intuition, and being able to take a fucking beating; this is probably from all those bar fights he and his friends have gotten into up in Wrigleyville. Johnny’s not afraid to bleed; in fact, the sight of blood seems to send him into a frenzy, which makes him hard to put down.