The Road So Far Pt. 8

The Road So Far Pt. 8

Posted on May 8, 2024 at 9:55 pm by Noah Hanson

The biggest win in my HOW career is being able to say that I beat Mike Best, the fucking Son of God, the legendary World champion, the King of the God Damn Mountain. Beating Mike, there are very few things that can compare emotionally, getting married, and having my daughter are the only things that go higher. I got my hands on the man, didn’t do enough damage to curb my bloodlust but for now, that will have to do. The calm before the storm is what they call it, I think. I mean beating Mike even though it was in a tag team match is just a feather in the cap type moment for me that I still haven’t processed it yet.  I wanna thank Drew Mitchell for everything he did in the match. He saved my ass for the most part and for that I am grateful.

The thing is this doesn’t end this between Mike and me, this is just a chapter, a footnote in what is gonna be a damn classic match-up at some point. I know you’re probably beating yourself up over this Mike and you should. This is old, washed-up, over-the-hill, wrinkled old man who beat your team in the end. So now what happens, Mike? What happens? Do you go into this match with Drew Mitchell and wonder what could’ve been? I doubt that I do. Your ego won’t let you believe that you lost this match. You’ll look at Teddy and the blame will fall firmly on him. Can’t say that I blame you, see Palmer was even worse than me. Looking like he wanted to gut me right then and there. I mean over what a swirly? Something I am sure happened to him plenty of times in high school. He doesn’t look like the type of person that wasn’t bullied in high school. He looks like he was stuffed in a few lockers back in the day. And now he is just trying to prop himself up with men who can carry him to a whole new level.

Palmer, you were talking tough about how I needed to put a pin in my obsession with Mike and focus on you. The funny thing is I was looking at you the whole time. Sure, I was shooting daggers at Mike with my eyes but in my head, I couldn’t wait to shut yer mouth. I couldn’t wait to show you just how much of a mistake you and Mike made by underestimating this old man. See that is exactly what you did, you both looked down on me and thought this was gonna be a cakewalk. Well, now both of you have a loss in yer record books thanks to Noah and Drew. So, what happens to you now if you lose to me a second time? Do you lose your jacket? Do you get kicked out of the alliance altogether?  Surely if you can’t beat “mid-card talent” like me one-on-one do you deserve to be part of the group? I guess that is up to God to decide after I hand you another loss.

It never changed my trajectory, not one fucking bit. Regardless of what Hollywood and I did to you my path was always gonna lead to Mike. You think that you are gonna put a fucking fork in MY road. Please, you need to learn a few things about me. The old Noah would have crawled into a hole and pulled the dirt over himself. This Noah is gonna stand there and throw a middle finger in the air right in yer goddamn face.

You talked about having fun, you bet yer ass we are gonna have fun. I can’t wait to put you down for good. I can’t wait to pummel you and I am gonna look at you and imagine your Mike and I am just gonna destroy you. Mike, I hope you pay attention; I hope you see what I do to your stablemate cause it won’t be pretty, it won’t be for the faint of heart. Parents don’t bring yer kiddos to the show cause I put my foot so far up his ass that when I need to itch my foot, I am gonna have to open Teddy’s mouth to do it.


You failed, you didn’t beat me, you didn’t humiliate me all you did was go on a cocksucking expedition. Oh, Mike, you’re the dynasty of HOW. Oh, Mike, I don’t wanna step on yer toes. At least fondle his balls if yer gonna blow the guy. I mean all that pandering was goddamn laughable. This guy that claimed I recharged his life and was gonna make an example outta me is the same guy that was basically on his fucking knees waiting for Mike’s nod to proceed. Trust you? Why should anyone trust you?  Because yer part of the alliance? No one outside of the alliance gives two shits about trusting you. Even Mike, if he is smart enough, will do his own thing for a bit because trusting you to get the job done is gonna be a tall order. I might be old, my knees might be killing me after each show, and I usually need a painkiller for my back as well. But that will be plenty to handle you. I thought you were gonna be a tougher challenge, but you aren’t as focused as you claimed you were. I would say yer off yer game quite a bit.

Mike don’t worry, after this little detour, it’s back to going right after you. And you can tell your little James Cornflake that this mid-card talent will deliver a fist sandwich to his face the next time he talks down to me like that again.  I never thought I would see the self-proclaimed “Greatest Modern Day Wrestler in the World” stoop to making excuses and blaming someone else. Maybe you’re not as talented as you believe you are. Maybe you’ve been drinking your own Kool-Aid for so long that when someone who is hungry for a change and has nothing to lose comes after you, things don’t go as you planned. That is exactly what happened. You thought that your “world-class talent” was gonna just run through me like a hot knife through butter. I know the HOW fanbase just did a collective gasp at my comments, but truth be told Mike basically said he was gonna wipe my face across the mat and he was gonna do this and that but in the end, it simply didn’t happen.

Cornbread is right about one thing; you have become a little fucking soft. I mean look at yer booking and then look at mine. I have been running the fucking gauntlet since I came back meanwhile you’ve been sitting on yer thrown with yer little cock in yer hand. Some will say I am playing a dangerous game, calling you soft but how else can I go except to call you that? You let an old man run over you and then you covered up like a little bitch. I mean Benny Newell called you the “single greatest HOW champion of all time” and you lost to the dude from KFC. How is your fragile ego gonna handle that? How did you sleep? I bet you fucking tossed and turned and maybe even had a nightmare about trying to get back into the ring and breaking up that count, but you came up just short. I bet that just haunts you now. I hope it does, I hope you have many sleepless nights over all that, you talked, but you failed to do what you claimed you were gonna do.

Should’ve tried to bury me like you wanted to. Maybe you’ll do that next time. But here’s what might also happen. I might ride this wave of confidence all over this place and turn this into a summer thrill ride to get another shot at you one-on-one. I might take yer best shot and do what no one will see coming. Beat you in the middle of the fucking ring for your precious belt. The ultimate insult to Lee Best, the man who came from a Fisher Price company, that has an endorsement deal from KFC could be holding his World title. Maybe that causes Lee to have a seizure? Maybe the whole audience passes out from the shock of the fucking century. Noah Hanson defeats Mike Best for the HOW World title. I can see the headlines already. I can see Sportscenter interrupting their broadcast for Breaking News. Mike would probably have to rethink his life choices because that would be the last thing anyone would expect. Noah Hanson overcame the odds to win it all. No one could see that coming, hell not even me.

Mike don’t worry though that is just me living in my ecstasy right now, basking in the glory of what happened. I was glowing after the win. I couldn’t believe it; I was in shock and now the next chapter is ready to be written.

Oh, and there is one last person that needs to be addressed and that is Darin Zion. The man that I helped mold with Brian Hollywood and Tyler Boyd to be the star that he became. He is still a world-class talent, but the man has chosen to align himself with the Final Alliance and has decided to stick his nose in business that doesn’t directly involve him. I know you are desperate for the attention of daddy, but you keep getting involved in MY business and I’ll forget everything there is between us as friends and do what needs to be done to try and cleanse you of all things Best related. Call it a spiritual cleansing if you will because you have become so blinded by the Alliance that you have forgotten who you are and mark my words you get involved in MY business again and I will address what you did in OCW and will handle this like men in the middle of the ring. You’ve forgotten who you are, it’s clear as day, but I will help you get back what you have lost. Oh, and yer little comment about beating Mike Best being special. Yeah, it is buddy but you should worry about actually winning a match this year pal.

So, Darin mind yer business, stay outta mine and everything will be aces after that, but you keep fucking with me whether it is in person or on social media and there will be consequences to be paid. Because if you think what happened to Palmer at March 2 Glory was bad just keep fucking with me and see what happens. I can promise you one thing you won’t like the results. But it seems to be an alliance-type thing to think you have the right to try and be some sorta bully. And that might work with some people Darin, but this is Noah Hanson, someone who knows you better than anyone here outside of Brian Hollywood and you’ve even managed to alienate him as well. So, I guess I should congratulate you because you have gone all in on yourself, and you lost the pot. Can’t say that I am shocked or anything because that is just the type of person you are, to bet everything on you regardless of what yer gut tells you. So, if I have to stand across the ring and try to beat some sense into that melon of yers then so be it. But you could’ve avoided all this, it never had to come to this point, but you know what fuck it. I’ve been patient, waited for you to call me or text all those months I was on the shelf when Kostoff hit me with that cinder block.

But you didn’t, nothing, no flowers, no get-well card, not even a text. So now that I think about you deserve everything you get because I was always there for you, and you have just failed. But this is gonna be your one last chance to fix it all. I am gonna come looking for you real soon, yer gonna have to make a decision, yer gonna have to decide what is more important, those clowns or your fucking friends, the ones that have ALWAYS had yer back.


So let’s see, have I covered everything?

Mike Best…check.

Teddy Palmer…check.

Darin Zion…check.

Silent Witness…

Shit can’t believe I forgot to cover that. Ya know I’ve watched the video a few times and to be honest, I thought I was a little off on my swing, see “golf pros” don’t have a way to convert swinging clubs to chairs so I thought I was off but then to hear Witness say he got in the way on purpose makes perfect sense now. He wants a healthy Mike Best when they meet again. I get it I do but let me make one thing clear. You get between me and what I want again, and I won’t stop hitting you. I’ll wear that motherfucking chair out over your limp body, and you can bank on that shit.

So now Silent Witness…check.

Chaos 62

Chicago, Il

Best Arena

Noah is shown proudly walking through the halls, like a cat that ate the canary, his smile is incredibly wide across his face. He doesn’t pay any mind to any of the staffers or talent that was in his way, he is just savoring the moment. He had done something he never thought he’d do…

Beat Mike Best…

Sure, it was a tag team match but that was never gonna take away his bravado. He walks confidently through the hall until he finds his dressing room, walks through the door, and is greeted by his wife Karen. The two embrace and Karen gives her husband a long, wet celebratory kiss.

“You did it, babe!” Karen exclaimed. “I am so proud of you!”

Noah nods his head and smiles. “I can’t take all the credit Mitchell was a great partner to have. Now is he Justin Evers or Fury or even Crazed? Nope, but he is a damn fine partner to have when it comes to beating Mike Best.”

“So, what do you wanna do now?” Karen asked. “Hit the clubs, party all night, get drunk? You earned that right to just get trashed.”

“Nope…” Noah said as he shook his head. “Just wanna catch a flight home and see the baby girl and start getting ready for the next show. Did they get the ring set up in the gym?”

Karen nodded. “Yeah, the guys got it all finished and the Flying Burritos are actually in town if you wanna work out with them.”

“Jose and Juan are in town?” Noah questioned his wife. “And they never called or anything?”

“They just got into town, doing a small tour of KC, Omaha, and then St. Louis.” Karen explained. “Asked if you wanted to do a sparring session with them?”

Noah nodded as he grabbed a towel, wiping the sweat from his face, and then sat down and started taking off his gear. “Yeah, go ahead and see if they wanna spar tomorrow afternoon and then we can have dinner later that night after they’re done with their show. We can go to Jack Stack BBQ. I know the owner and see if they will reserve a couple of tables for us.”

Karen nodded and looked up the phone number and walked away as the phone rang and Noah walked towards the showers, again a trail of clothes fell behind him as he made his way to the shower. After a few moments, steam can be seen flowing from the shower and Noah is singing of all things “Saturday Nights Alright (For Fighting)” by Elton John. But then suddenly things go quiet, the singing has stopped, and Karen hasn’t noticed it yet as she is still on her phone talking to the restaurant management. Karen finally finishes her call and looks around and doesn’t see or hear her husband and looks a little confused. “Noah?”


“Noah?” Karen yelled and then walked towards the showers, the steam from the shower had filled the room. She pulls the door open, and Noah is sitting on the floor of the shower. He is mumbling to himself and rocking back and forth.

“How did I get here?” Noah asked, looking confused as he looked up at his wife.

“What do you mean?” Karen asked, looking puzzled.

“Last thing I remember is swinging a chair and now I’m in the shower and I don’t know how I got here.” Noah confusingly explained. “What is wrong with me?”

Karen helped her husband to his feet and then wrapped him in a towel. Noah slowly walked over to the bench and sat down, the confusion growing on his face as he looked around, trying to piece together the last few moments.

“What happened?” Noah quizzed his wife. “Why can’t I remember the ending of the match?”

“Your biggest win in HOW and you don’t remember beating Mike Best?” Karen asked, trying to make sure she heard her husband right.

Noah shakes his head. “We won?” Noah nervously chuckles. “Of course, I don’t remember my biggest win in HOW…the story of my life…”

“I’m gonna make a few calls to your doc tomorrow and see if he has any thoughts about what could cause this.” Karen said as she flipped through her contacts.

Noah is shown sitting there and he starts humming something, it’s hard to tell what it is but Karen looks at her husband, even more concerned than she was originally.