The Road So Far Pt. 5

The Road So Far Pt. 5

Posted on March 27, 2024 at 7:18 pm by Noah Hanson

  • Hollywood was right, he usually is. We have always been like brothers, like family, hell I still look at Zion and Boyd as family as well. I can’t help that Boyd has more or less disappeared from the business but if he were to show up on my porch and ask for my help would gladly help him as much as I could. I mean that even more so for Darin. See when I first met the kid, he was so wet behind the ears, he was so full of bravado and a willingness to do whatever he could to be a part of the group and we let him in, we let him carry the bags and then after a while I saw what he could finally be. I saw that Darin could be so much more, I saw so much potential in him back then. Sure, he wanted to run with us, sure he was a little annoying back then, but no one could fault him for trying to do everything he could to just be a part of something special.

 

See we went through hell and back in the early days of PWX. I watched as Darin grew into being more than just a comedy act. He became a very talented wrestler, he became a very decorated wrestler and one of the pillars of the foundation that was PWX. I wish he could see the value in himself that I still see to this day. I know Hollywood thinks I need to distance myself from him but he is still family and family doesn’t turn its back on each other. Hollywood has every right to not want to be anywhere near Zion, I get it I really do. Zion sometimes gets lost in his overcoming urge to be accepted. I can relate. I was like that for a long time and it took me an even longer time to realize that trying to please everyone was only doing more harm to myself.

 

So Hollywood, Palmer and I will be standing in the ring and the one that walks out will get a shot at the H0tv title. And just like Hollywood I am not convinced I deserve a chance at any title but I will say this. I will go out there and give the two of them my absolute best, it’s the only way I know how to do things is by going hard and whatever happens….happens.

 

One thing I have noticed about Hollywood and myself is that we mirror each other. We have both lost faith in our abilities. We have both gone down a more solitary existence lately. I mean money and power can only do so much for a person and while the two of us have plenty of cash it doesn’t always fill the voids in our hearts and minds. I hear him talk about Serenity and remember all that, I remember how down he was, the thing is I have been there just as much as he has been. Damaged goods, I have been called that in the past and well no one could be faulted for calling me that because I am. Broken, defeated, one foot in the grave are all terms you could use to describe me. I believe Hollywood said I have “baggage” and he wouldn’t be wrong, it is probably one of the more accurate terms a person could use to describe me. Baggage? Funny years ago, I would never have thought that I would be the one that is damaged after all that has gone over the years but yet here we are. I have tried to fix myself, tried every pill to try and medicate myself but they only numb me to what is staring me right in the face.

 

I blamed everyone for what was happening to me, when I lost matches there was always a laundry list of reasons for why I didn’t win. Granted I praised myself when I won but it was always easier to do that when my hand was getting raised, always easier. But when I lost it was like I refused to look in the mirror and ask that person who was responsible in the end. It was always my fault, I just thought it was always easier to blame someone else than it was to take a cold, long look in the mirror and see my own faults. That is where I am now, looking in that mirror and hating what I see in the reflection. I always thought it was the thing in the business to blame someone or something else. I mean a fast count, an incompetent referee or someone that was just a better cheater, it was always easier to find an out than it was to admit that some days I just wasn’t the better person, that someone just might be more talented than I was. I know, I know someone more talented than me, surely that is blasphemy. I can see where my fans might be a little confused because the Noah from the old days would never admit his own shortcomings, but this is a different time, a different person. This Noah Hanson is nothing like the one from the past, gone is the cold, heartless bastard that would do anything and everything to come out on top. I know that Hollywood will give me his very best and I can only hope that Palmer will do the same, but this was never part of the plan. Being given an opportunity to go after a title is something I have balked at over and over because this journey is not about gold or prosperity, this is about one thing and one thing only. Taking Mike Bests’ head home with me in a gym bag so it can be stuffed and fucking mounted over my fireplace. 

 

Some call it tunnel vision and that is exactly what this is. I have heard he is begging for someone to give a good fight and all I got to say is buddy boy be careful what you fucking wish for cause this old piece of beef jerky is ready to answer that fucking call.

 

Hollywood says that there are no coincidences in HOW, that there is a script that has to be followed. He tells me not to trust the man that Zion has become and that he isn’t worth it. I have a problem believing that, I know he can be reached, I know he can be redeemed. Being a lap dog for Lee Best was never his destiny. Brian if I know anything about you it’s this, we’re brothers, we’re family and you need to reach out and try to steer your brother back on the right course. Now mind you I’m not asking to get the band back together because I think that it would only harm the two of your careers to be associated with me at this point. That doesn’t mean that I won’t be there if you need someone to go to war with because I’ll always be there for that.

 

Brian, I am glad that you are excited to have me back in HOW, to be honest I had a lot of reservations about even talking to you and Darin again because I didn’t want to be a distraction, I don’t want to be a crutch to your careers in this company. It was my fault for how they treated you guys the last time I was here, I let my mouth run wild and my heart couldn’t handle everything else. I know you still call me brother and for that I am forever grateful but don’t give up on Darin just yet. I can still see the kid we took in; I can see it in his eyes. I watched him for a while now and while he might be hanging on every word of “daddy Best” believe me he needs us now more than ever…

 

There is no doubt in me that you will come at me hard, and I know you try and put me down with everything you have, I wouldn’t have it any other way bro, I want you to hit me with the hardest Executive Promise that you have ever delivered. Don’t disappoint me, don’t go easy on me because of my age. I am gonna hit you with everything I have, I am gonna use every fucking dirty trick I have in my playbook because that is the only way I know how to do this. “Go hard or go fucking home” they say these days and it has never been truer than it will be when we meet in the ring.

 

Truth be told the match against Scottywood is nothing more than a blur. I remember starting the match and I remember being in the locker room later, everything else is blank. Karen, like you said, it was a darker Noah on that day but when I watch the video and look at myself it’s not a darker side but an older side, the old Noah from years ago. See I have tried to repress those desires, tried to push it all down to deepest parts of my body but fighting Scotty caused something to happen and I really don’t know how to explain it, but some call it bloodlust and I blame these people, these degenerates that come to these fucking shows and want to see carnage and it flips a switch in my head. We clicked because we are men cut from the same kinda cloth. But Brian you talk about going down a dark path but there is still time for you to right the ship, there is still time for you to fix all of this. Me? There is no going back, my destiny, my fate is waiting for me, and his name is Mike Best. He has been calling to me for years, even without words he has been calling me, mocking me and like a maggot under my skin it has made me itch for years. It wasn’t until earlier this year that I finally realized that for better or worse I was finally gonna get a chance to itch that damn thing.

And I could give a rat’s ass about any agenda that Lee Best may have because I am always glad to get a chance to go in the ring with someone, I call a friend. We are gonna tear the FUCKING place down and I hope that Mr. Best is watching and paying close attention because daddy and son are gonna know one thing. The days of mocking Noah Hanson and Brian Hollywood are mother fucking OVER.

Brothers in arms? I like the sound of that, gonna go into March to Glory and sure there is gonna be some title matches but know this we are gonna show all these fucking pricks that we can still go. And Brian there is no one else I’d wanna go to fucking war with then my brothers…

So, let’s fucking go…

 

Where: Kansas City, KS

Place: Office of Dr. Seth Bare

Time: 3 pm

Last Video on Youtube: “Humble and Kind” by Tim McGraw

 

Noah is shown walking into the reception room of his therapist and approaches the desk of the receptionist. She is intently looking over some papers as Noah walks up.

“I’m here for an appointment.” Noah remarked.

The receptionist didn’t say a word but instead raised her hand and extended her index finger.

“I am here to see Dr. Bare.” Noah added.

“Obviously…” the receptionist snapped.

“Maybe you don’t understand.?” Noah replied but then was cut off. 

“Take a seat, the doc will see you shortly.” she snapped off again.

Noah rubbed his forehead with his hand and seemed even more irritated and walked over and looked at the seats and decided to sit next to a man that seemed to have some issue with keeping his hands idle. His hands are moving a mile a minute and as Noah looked at him and then shook his head but then a tall brunette strutted in dressed what could only be described as a slutty teacher. Noah looked on as he took it all in, white stocking, short skirt, high heels. It was like Noah was a deer in headlights and he barely heard the man next to him talk.

 

“That’s Pam…” the man remarked. “…she’s a nympho….”

 

Pam seemed to have heard his comment and got up from her seat and then took a few steps and was standing in front of the strange man and Noah. She looked at Noah who could only manage a slightly less creepy smile. “Donovon, I’ve told you I have a problem…”

“Yeah, I know…” Donvan added. “But the new guy needed to know about you.”

Noah looked off put by the comment.

“New guy?” Pam asked. “Got a name doll face?”

“Sure.” Noah coldly replied. “And I’m NOT a newbie, been a client of the doc for years, it’s just that recent events have caused me to sorta relapse.”

“Poor baby.” Pam said as she squeezed herself in between Noah and Donovan. “I mean look at you, all those muscles and the long salt colored hair. I could just eat you up.”

Noah raised a hand and showed his wedding band to Pam who seemed disappointed. “Happily?” Pam asked.

“Very…” Noah replied.

“Well we all have our vices I guess.” Pam replied. “The doc will get you all fixed lickity split.”

“I hope so.” Noah replied. “I have felt really lost lately. Like I have forgotten my purpose in all of this.”

“It can be tough, for sure but again the doc will get you all straight.” Pam reassured Noah, who forced a smile to appear. “You have a wonderful smile, even if you don’t have it all the way out.”

“It’s been hard to smile these last few years.” Noah explained. “Facing my demons again has made me wonder if I really belong anywhere or if I am just supposed to die miserable and alone.”

Pam looked down at the ring and looked confused. “I think you might wanna sit down with your little lady and tell her this. I think you might be shocked to learn that couples usually work better together.”

“Pam leave the man alone, not every person that walks in here is someone for you to add to your list of conquests.” Donovan remarked, trying to deflect from Noah.

“I am just trying to help the man.” Pam replied and then crossed her legs and looked like she was starting to pout. “And another thing….”

“Here we go…” Donovan said, alerting Noah of the impending doom.

“Your problem little mister scratch and sniff is that I may come on a little strong, but I’ve never come on to you.” Pam barked.

Noah’s eyes visibly widened as Pam fired off her first warning shot.

YOU’RE not my type.” Donovan declared.

“Whatever….” Pam said as she pulled out her phone and then got up. “Be careful around this guy, he’s a little bit of a creep.”

Noah nodded. “Just here to see the doc.” 

“We all are.” Donovan remarked.

“You really should put something on some of those.” Noah said as he looked at some of the wounds. 

“He’s a cutter…” a black dude in the corner added.

“Cutter?” Noah asked.

“Yeah. tried to kill himself a few times and just hasn’t figured out how to do it right.” the man explained.

Noah is now fidgeting in his seat as he now seems to be a bit uncomfortable with the people around him. 

“So, what brings you here?” the man asked.

“I keep hearing voices and I have thoughts of rage and hurting people.” Noah explained.

“But aren’t you, Noah Hanson?” the man asked.

Noah lowered his head slightly. “Yes.”

“You do TV and movies, and you wrestle right?” the man asked.

Noah nodded.

“So how can you have those issues, you have money, fame you can’t be that fucked up.” the man probed. 

“You’d be shocked to hear some of my stories from when I was younger.” Noah warned.

“Well maybe some time you can tell me some of those tales over a glass of beer and some wings?” the man asked.

Noah seemed confused. “Why?” 

“Call me curious.” the man replied. 

Noah looked at the man, trying to figure out his angle. “You’re not gay, are you?”

“No.” The man growled. “And what does that have to do with anything?”

“Well, I don’t swing that way in case you were.” Noah explained.

“You like sports?” the man asked.

“Of course.” Noah replied.

“You know where Johnnies’ Tavern is?” the man asked.

“Yep.” Noah replied.

“I go there every day after work, have a couple beers and go home.” the man replied. “You ever in the area drop by and share some stories and I’ll buy you a beer.”

Noah seemed cautious at the offer; the receptionist finally got up. “Noah the doc will see you now.” Noah looked relieved as he got up and started to walk towards the door to the back room. Pam pinched his ass on the way by and winked at him. Noah rolled his eyes as he walked into the back area and was met by Dr. Bare.

“How are we doing today, Noah?” Dr. Bare asked.

Noah looked back before the door closed as Pam blew him a kiss as Donovan can only look on and face palm it all.

“We need to talk about the people you let in here.”

****fade***