Posted by Christopher America
Thanks for the gift, Lee, you’ve really spoiled me.
This was the kind of fight I was thinking of when I joined Ye Olde High Octane Fight Chimpchamp.
Standing inside that cage as we set sail for the wonderful world of Glorious Nippon was just so… freeing. It felt like I had always belonged, that this was what I was meant to be doing with my life. Sure, Robert didn’t have a secret plan of revenge and chaos like I anticipated. He appeared to be more in a drugged induced haze than ready to fight but… I’m a charitable lad, he tapped lickity split, his arm didn’t go snippity snap. Bobby’s a smart one. Are you, Brian?
I’m going to bet money that you aren’t. Well, I can’t actually bet money, as your idiot friend learned on Refueled
Or is it former friend now? I honest to god can’t keep trap of your low grade Spanish Soap Opera lives. By the time Saturday roles around, I’m going to assume you guys are going to reform and disband Sex and Money another sixteen times.
Poor Darin, biggest win for him in this era of HOW and no opportunity to cash in. Although that must actually burn you up Bribri. You’re the former World Champion of the two, you must have always thought of yourself above that bud of yours. The hate must be bubbling within you, practically oozing out of every pore that lil Darin Zion is one of the most talked about men in High Octane Wrestling and people can barely remember you’re on the roster.
I’m sure in your head right now you are dreaming sugar plum dreams of knocking me out, making me tap, making me piss my pantaloons in terror, I mean, I don’t know which fetish you get off on…
Wait, is that why you guys were called S&M? That makes a lot of sense. Have you still got the gimp suit?
This fight is Brian Hollywood’s ticket to return to the big time. I’m sure we’re moments away from learning that he’s been studying all his failures in his last two sad, pathetic outings in the cage and he’s been doing intense samurai style training under a waterfall to show he’s a changed man.
I’ve heard he’s even studied the art of the blade.
The problem for you Brian… I really want to fuck your shit up.
Bobby Dean, that was a business match. A match against a man I respect more than most in this company. A quick hop in and out of the cage, hit the showers, yell at the awful catering. Perfectly normal work day in the world of all things High Octane.
You though, Brian? Well that’s a much more exciting prospect.
Did you guys know that in my VERY first match in High Octane Wrestling, to protect the honour of his balding, decrepit, dusty, delusional, pathetic and incredibly horny pal Noah Hanson, he ran down to the ring and done did a post-match beatdown on your ole pal Cecilworth? I’d proven in seconds that these men weren’t worth the money they were signed to and they did not like that. Big Brian had to prove a point, I guess. I mean, “I’m a fucking coward” is some form of point, I suppose.
I’ve fucking resented you from day 1, Brian. Fuck, I filmed a little skit where I pretended to LITERALLY DIE just so I could make everyone laugh at the fact that Brian Hollywood lost to a corpse that week.
And it was very funny.
You lost to my corpse. Hahaha, man, I’m still laughing now. Not good enough to defeat literal dead weight.
You were a fucking tourist as World Champion, snapping a few pics with the belt before handing it off again days later, a disgrace to the lineage. I OWNED that belt.
You were given all the advantages one could have in this era of High Octane. The numero two-o seed for the World Title tournament, a bye in the brackets, a straightforward path to the final.
Then you still fucking lost.
To a guy with bad breath.
I became an ICON.
What have you actually achieved this era, Brian? That you keep coming up with failing master plans? The Order sends its regards.
What you started seven years ago, that first shot in a simmering cold war, it ends on Saturday.
The Berlin Wall has crumbled.
Please don’t tap. I’m asking nicely.