No Stronk on Glory March Show?

No Stronk on Glory March Show?

Posted on March 24, 2022 at 8:43 am by Stronk Godson

Note From Shelley Greene:
The following diatribe is a “blog” written by the greatest man to have ever lived, STRONK GODSON, in response to his not being booked for March To Glory.  I’ve typed up, as I could, what was originally scrawled in permanent marker across several PostIt notes.  (I do apologize in advance.  Sorry.  Really.  Please don’t fire us.  Stronk’s ‘vitamins’ need some tuning, I think.)

WHY IS THE STRONK MAN NOT ON GLORY MARCH SHOW?  WHAT KIND OF IDIOT COMPANY DOES NOT BOOK THE STRONK MAN?  DOES H-O-W NOT WANT MONEY?  DO THEY NOT WANT MONEY FROM FANS LOOKING TO SEE WHAT A REAL MAN LOOKS LIKE?  IT CONFUSES STRONK, MAKES HIS BRAIN HURT.  I CRUSH XANDER WHOEVERTHEFUCK,  AND NO BIG MONEY MATCH?  AND YOU PUT A WOMAN ON THE SHOW?  A WOMAN GETS TO MAKE THE MAN’S MONEY?  FOR WHAT?  FOR TAMPON MONEY?  FOR HAIR ROLLERS?  FOR A NEW MAKEUP THING?  IT’S LIKE STRONK HAS AN ITCHY ASSHOLE THAT HE CAN’T SCRATCH.  AND THEN YOU LOOK DOWN THE CARD AND SEE NOTHING BUT HETERO TWINKBOYS IN WEIRD SPANDEX PANTS.  ONLY STRONK SHOULD WEAR THE SPANDEX.  HIS MUSCLES ARE PRIMED TO POP.  HE FILLS OUT THE SPANDEX.  Y’ALL TWINKBOYS LOOK FOOLISH.  THE SPANDEX MAKES YOUR THIGHS LOOK SKINNIER AND MORE STUPIDER AND DUMBER.  SPANDEX ON STRONK IS NICELY WRAPPED PRESENT.  SPANDEX ON YOU IS DEAD PUPPY  IN A BOX ON CHRISTMAS MORNING.  MAKES STRONK’S DICK LIMP WITH SADNESS.  LEE BEST MUST LIKE HIS BOYS FRAIL AND TRANSLUCENT.  HE MUST LIKE THEM BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO OTHER OPTIONS.  THEY CANNOT PLAY A FOOTBALL SPORTS GAME OR LIFT HEAVY THINGS LIKE A REAL MAN.  THEY CAN ONLY DANCE AND CHOP AND MAKE STUPID FACES.  THE FANS WANT SOMEONE THEY CAN LOOK UP TO AND POINT TO AND SAY TO THEIR WEIRDO KIDS, HEY WEIRDOS, SEE THAT MAN MOUNTAIN THERE ON THE TV SCREEN?  THAT’S A REAL MAN.   YOUR DADDY WISHED HE LOOKED LIKE THAT CUZ THEN HE WOULDN’T GET BULLIED AT HIS BANK JOB AND CRY INTO YOUR MOTHER’S RANK PUSSY EVERY NIGHT.  THEN THE DADDY STOPS AND GIVES HIS DUMB HEAD A SHAKE AND REALIZES THAT, OH WAIT, HE DON’T HAVE NO KIDS.  CUZ NO WOMAN WOULD EVER BREED WITH SUCH A PATHETIC BETA MALE.  WOMEN WANT TO KEEP THEIR WOMBS FERTILE AND PURE FOR THE REAL MAN.  AND LEE BEST, YOU DENY THE WORLD THE CHANCE TO SEE WHAT PERFECTION LOOKS LIKE?  YOU ARE A BAD PERSON AND THOUGH THE STRONK MAN DOES NOT OFFICIALLY HATE YOU YET HE KINDA DOES ALREADY A LITTLE BIT.  THIS IS THE DUMBEST DECISION EVER MADE IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND AND STRONK ASKED SOME PEOPLE AND THEY SAID YES, THAT’S TRUE.  SO BE BETTER AT YOUR JOB YOU STUPID FUCKTARD ASSHOLE CUNT BITCH.  STRONK WON’T BE NICE NEXT TIME.

Note From Shelley Greene:
Again, verrrrrry sorry.