Legendary For A Reason.

Legendary For A Reason.

Posted on March 9, 2024 at 4:19 pm by Silent Witness

Wednesday, March 6th. 7:45pm.

Chicago, IL.


“Mate, I’ve fucking told you!” yelled Mickey Gibson; exasperated. “The insurance is sorted: You don’t have anything to worry about!” 

He shook his head, frustrated with Silent Witness. Because this was the seventh time the LSD Legend had asked about insurance for his upcoming Inferno Match in the last 3 hours. Still, they weren’t done.

“I know it’s covered as far as getting burned alive goes… At least, as much as they’re willing to cover that. But I don’t care about that, Mick…” began the HOW star. “I’ve been in plenty of Inferno matches, I know the risks… My concern is stepping into the ring with a fucking cannibal that will try to cook me and then eat me!” he added. “We watched that fucker’s match at ICONIC together – I know you know what I’m talking about, Mick. I need to know that if Evan eats my leg or some shit, and I have to retire, that I’ll at least get looked after, financially!” explained Silent Witness, throwing his arms out in a sign of exasperation matching that of his agent and confidant.

The Greatest LSD Champion of All Time™ stood up from his familiar surroundings for work chat with Gibson – the latter’s kitchen island – and walked up to his agent. He raised his hand directly in front of Mickey’s face.

“Do you see that, Mick?” he asked. “Do you see how all of my fingers are intact and point in the right direction? I’ve been wrestling in matches like this one coming up for decades, and I still have all my digits in full working order. I’d like to keep it that way, but I saw Rhys’ hand after he fought Evan. It’s the most disgusting image of a hand I’ve seen in professional wrestling since some old lady gave birth to one in the year 2000!”

Mickey looked at him, confused. “You saw an old woman give birth to… what the fuck are you talking about, mate?” he asked. Silent Witness motioned with his hand, swatting the question away.

“Ah, it was just some indy promotion or something, don’t worry about it” he replied. Mickey shrugged it off. “The point is, Evan Ward – aside from being a fucking under-rated wrestler – is a fucking animal. So, can you please – for the love of ‘Are ya there God? It’s me, Margaret’ – check the fucking insurance?!” yelled the LSD Legend, frustrated.

Mickey finally nodded his head and sighed. “Ok. I’ll check” he said, resigning himself to defeat in this ridiculous argument. Silent Witness smiled, patting the Brit on the shoulder.

“That’s all you had to say!” replied the LSD Legend. “Shit…” exclaimed the Hall of Famer with a sigh. “After that run-in with Jace last night and that bullshit with Evan this morning, I thought I might have a quiet few days to prepare for Chaos, but you…” he added, pointing a finger at his agent, albeit with a smile. “… you just had to give me one more thing to stress about, didn’t ya?” said the LSD Legend with a chuckle.

Gibson let out a sigh of his own. He looked down, composed himself, then looked up at Silent Witness, smiling. Mickey had learned a long time ago which battles to pick with the talent that he represented, and this was not one of those battles. “Well, now you can just relax” he said, before gesturing towards a bottle of whisky on the kitchen counter – because holy fuck did he need it after this nonsense – and guided Silent Witness back to where he was sat to pour it.

The LSD Legend grabbed the bottle and two glasses, and quickly poured generously into both. Pushing one of them towards his agent, his thoughts turned back to Evan Ward and their highly-anticipated match on Monday night. 

“He’s changed, man” he began. “Evan was always respectful – maybe too respectful. I always felt he was held back by that, if I’m honest…” continued the Hall of Famer, taking a sip of whisky as he paused for a moment. “I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen Evan more dangerous than he is right now. This is going to be a tough fucking match” added Silent Witness. He shook his head. “I don’t know what the fuck got into him, man. Him and Townsend, both – they came back to HOW and did I get a call, or a text? No. Nothing. Not even a ‘hey man, we’re going back to HOW, just F-Y-fucking-I’… Not a word from either of those pricks. We were supposed to be a team – Ground fucking Zero, man…” he shook his head. “But they came back without me.”

“And now Townsend has fucked off before you can beat his arse for it. But that means you can take all that anger out on Ward – he’s just as much of a cunt for it, mate” interjected Gibson. It was a point that Silent Witness had thought to himself, too. He nodded his head in agreement.

“And this is the perfect match for it. No rules – other than set that asshole on fire.. I’m going to punish him, Mick. This won’t be a quick match – I want it to be fucking surgical. I want to break him, mentally and physically… Those two assholes want to exclude me?” asked the LSD Legend, before inhaling sharply. “Well, I fucking showed up anyway. Now one of them has disappeared and the lunatic is running the asylum. 

“He’s unhinged, Mick. It’s going to take absolutely everything I have to beat him, but I will fucking beat him. I’ve been away for too long… They’ve forgotten who the fuck I am. Scotty and Hanson were a great way to come back after so long out, but this is the real challenge – this is the statement win, when I burn Evan Ward.” The Hall of Famer paused for a moment, taking another sip of his whisky, as he thought about his opponent for Monday night. 

“What I’ve realized since I’ve been back is… the game has changed” he shrugged. “It used to be that you build your reputation through hard work, incremental gains from beating your peers… Now I just see people shilling themselves for attention. Ward knows it – that’s where this… fucking insane cannibal bullshit has come from. He’s selling himself to the TikTok generation for traction on social media. 

“I don’t care for it, personally. But if that’s what he feels like he needs to do to feel better about himself, who the fuck am I to question it?” added the Hall of Famer, before taking another sip of whisky. “All I know is, when it comes to a wrestling match, it doesn’t count for shit, and I’ve always been just that little bit better than him.”

Mickey Gibson quickly jumped in. “He’s changed, though – you said it yourself” he began. “Whatever has happened in the past doesn’t count for shit anymore, mate. You have to take him as this dangerous, finger eating cunt that he has turned into.”

Silent Witness nodded his agreement. “I know. This isn’t the Make-A-Wish Evan – which he fucking stole from me, anyway – that I’ve been accustomed to. He’s ruthless, and he’s got the General Manager on his side. Jace will do anything he can to stop me from getting anywhere near that LSD Title, so I’m expecting fuckery on Monday. I don’t know what he’s got planned, but that bastard won’t let me advance to March 2 Glory and strengthen my claim to the #1 Contender spot for my title” proclaimed the HOW veteran.

“Especially after MVW. I told him I would spend that fine money on a flight to watch his match, and I’m a man of my word. But he is every bit as underhanded as I am honest, so I fully expect that asshole to involve himself, one way or another” added the LSD Legend, before pausing for another drink.

Before he could continue, both Silent Witness and his agent were distracted by the loud vibration of plastic against granite – Mickey’s wife and Silent Witness’ personal trainer, Tamara Klein, was trying to FaceTime, and Mickey’s phone was vibrating on the counter top. “Sorry” he apologised, before reaching to answer it. “She’s out with the girls on a hen do” he added, full of dread, as he hit the big green button with a wide, fake smile. “Hello my love” he said, as he waited for the video to load.

“WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!” came the high-pitched shrill from the other end. “Hey babeeee” screamed TK, as her pixelated face came into focus, from a bar somewhere in downtown Chicago. “WE’RE HAVING A GREAT TIME!!!” she bellowed, to  massive cheering from her friends around her. Silent Witness looked at Mickey, and Mickey looked at him – both with the same telling expression: Jesus fucking christ, how drunk is she?!

“That’s great, dear…” said Gibson, with an air of resentment towards his near future, when his far-too-drunk-to-give-consent wife would be stumbling into bed next to him. “I’m just here talking to our favourite client…” he added, before swiveling the phone in his hand to face Silent Witness.

“WOOOOOOO!!!!” screamed TK again, before suddenly wrinkling her face. “Aren’t you facing Evan Ward next week? He’s going to try to eat you!” she said, laughing drunkenly. Witness and Gibson once again exchanged a knowing glance.

“I am,” replied the Hall of Famer. “Looks like you’re having a fun night,” he added.

“WOOOOO!!!” came the piercing scream, once more. “We are! Well, except for Tracey – she jumped in a puddle to splash everyone, but the hole was three feet deep! She got soaked, then fell over trying to get out!” added Klein, before letting out a high-pitch squeal of delight. “It was so funny!”

“Ok, well we will let you carry on with your night, babe” said Gibson, quickly cutting in. As Tammy attempted to say something else, Gibson ended the call. With a sigh, he put the phone down, puffed out his cheeks and looked at the LSD Legend. “Well, that’s going to be fun to navigate when she gets home,” he said with a chuckle.

“See what I mean?” replied Silent Witness, largely ignoring the commentary from his agent. “Everyone knows Ward just wants to disfigure people. I need to fuck this guy up and make sure he doesn’t have a chance to do something fucking crazy” he added.

“You both know each other so well, though,” said Mickey. “He will know everything you’re going to do,” he added, cautiously. Silent Witness shook his head, dismissively.

“No, Evan has never seen my LSD side. When we were in Ground Zero, I was making charity appearances and playing the PG-TV game. And he could say the same about me – I’ve never faced this Joker version of Evan Ward…” he shrugged. “I guess we’re both in the same situation, to a point. We have both changed over the last few years – both of us have stopped trying to create picturesque matches, with perfect wrestling. We have both moved on to beating the crap out of our opponent with the sole aim of winning the match, by any means necessary. 

“I guess the biggest difference is that, for the majority of my career, that’s been my M.O… Evan has spent his time being the clean cut, champion of the people” added the once self-proclaimed High Octane Hero. “You can see how hard he is trying to portray this edgy, violent image of himself. Just look at this morning – he made sure the cameras and the microphone picked up on him saying that he wants to burn me, calling me a cunt… He sounded like you, Mick” he stated, with a smile.

“But before that, he was as respectful as ever. He was the Evan I have always known, right up until he pushed me. I guess that’s a part of him now, and I have to be ready for it… That isn’t who he is at his core – he’s still the same guy he has always been. He isn’t about the LSD life, and nothing screams LSD division more than an Inferno match – that’s my in. Anyone can scream and shout in front of the media, but when it really comes down to it – when it’s just me and Evan in that ring, surrounded by flames… We will see how much of it is real.”

Mickey quickly interrupted. “Well, he beat the fuck out of Townsend… I think it’s pretty real, mate. You have to be prepared for it” he said, stating the obvious. Silent Witness, however, shook his head.

“He beat the fuck out of another pure wrestler. He’s heading into a match that essentially has no rules against a man that has made a career in matches that have no rules. I know what it takes to win when you’re in the fucking trenches. Townsend – for the incredible wrestler that he is – doesn’t know how to mentally overcome being beaten, bloody, broken beneath the carnage of a match like that. Evan just mentally out-maneuvered him, that was the only difference between them in that match.

“I don’t want to lose a fucking finger, or an arm, or… fucking who knows, that prick might try to bite my dick off if he gets half a chance. But whatever happens, I know how to take myself to a place, mentally, that very few others are capable of when the entire world is falling apart around them. It’s why I am The Greatest LSD Champion of All Time™ – I know how to disassociate reality with what I have to do to win. I don’t believe – and if he’s really honest with himself, Evan doesn’t believe – that he has what it takes to take yourself to that place. 

“And that is how I beat Evan Ward on Monday night. Not by out-wrestling him – we are both technically gifted wrestlers. Not by playing a role for the crowd, or by outlasting another man that is out of his comfort zone. I live in this zone. Jace may have tried to stack the deck against me, because he’s the big boss and he’s on Evan’s side and he likes to burn people, but he’s fallen into the same trap as everybody else – he has forgotten just who made the LSD Title what it is today. I’ve burned people in Inferno matches – fuck, I’ve burned people in regular LSD matches – so this… vain attempt at staying relevant in a division he has abandoned, will only backfire for Jace’s new project. Evan Ward has aligned himself with the wrong person, and on Monday Night Chaos, he is going to suffer like he has never done before.

“This is my type of match, it’s what I’ve done for over 20 years and Evan Ward has no fucking clue what he’s in for. He does not know how to hang in there when every single nerve in his body is screaming for the pain to stop. He doesn’t know what to do when your brain is telling you that the only option is to run away, but you have to stand there and take even more punishment. Nobody on this fucking roster knows better than I do how to handle that level of mental anguish, Mick.

“I am THE Greatest LSD Champion of All Time™. And on Monday NIght Chaos, I will remind the world of exactly what the fuck that means” yelled Silent Witness, angrily finishing his rant. Mickey Gibson nodded in agreement, without saying a word. Both men sat silently for a moment, before the LSD Legend’s agent took a sip of his whisky and looked at his client with a mischievous smile.

“You know this isn’t a promo, right? You’re sat in my kitchen.”

Mickey laughed; drawing a smile from the former HOW World Champion. “Fuck off, you prick” came the response, before the two chuckled to each other and raised their glasses, gulping back the rest of their drinks.