- Event: Chaos 019
Stronk is in a place that is not Minnesota but is still America. Stronk is small and weak and Stronk does not have something called an appetite. An appetite is a thing that humans have that makes them hungry and then when they have eaten enough meat the appetite goes away. Humans apparently only eat enough to feel full. Stronk used to eat all the meat and then more meat until there was no more meat. This is strange for Stronk and it makes Stronk sad because meat is needed for building and maintaining three hundred pounds of mass but Stronk can only eat enough meat to not die of starvation.
Stronk weighed himself when the brightness of the day came and the darkness went goodbye and Stronk is only two hundred and thirty pounds. This is the ideal weight for a healthy human woman but not a healthy human Stronk. Stronk is basically a tiny human woman and Stronk should probably wear dresses and talk about vaginal bleeding and salads but Stronk does not understand either of those things and so Stronk is sad.
Great Scott lives with Stronk in the house in the sky now and Great Scott and Stronk spend all day together every day. Great Scott and Stronk are going to fight human men they do not know very soon and this will be Stronk’s first battle since Conor Fuse destroyed Stronk’s brain and body. Stronk is worried but Great Scott has been helping Stronk get better and so Stronk thanks Great Scott.
Great Scott took Stronk to where poor people live and die and Great Scott showed Stronk how to wear shirts that show your belly and shorts that show your thighs. And Great Scott showed Stronk how to ‘stick-and-move’ and dance and run on a beach and splash in the water until the world froze while we embraced and it was everything you would think it was plus much more.
Stronk has a dog now and Stronk calls him Dog. Dog eats a lot but less than Mongo. And Dog pisses and makes mud all over the sky house but Stronk is not mad about it because it was a gift from Papa Best and Stronk loves Dog. There is a human woman that comes by every day and cleans up Dog’s waste and cleans Stronk and Great Scott’s manties and undershirts and cooks meals before they need to be consumed.
This is a very happy time for Stronk except for the fact that Stronk is still small and cannot lift heavy objects.
Great Scott is a very wise human man and is very confident and tells Stronk he used to be sad as well but became happy and Great again. Great Scott says Stronk will be STRONK again one day soon but Stronk needs to do as he says and not question him.
Stronk would never think of questioning Great Scott.
Stronk would never think of thinking anything. Period.
Great Scott says the Great Stronk team will be champions and Stronk believes that will be so.
Great Scott has a championship belt that Stronk used to have but is a better champion than Stronk and also Great Scott has a bear that Stronk would like to wrestle but Great Scott says Stronk will die if Stronk tries. Maybe one day when Stronk is STRONK again.
Stronk just expelled waste from Stronk’s asshole and now Stronk is only two hundred and twenty pounds. Great Scott says this is because Stronk has ‘THE OPIOD SHITS’ and had not pooped in a month and a half. That makes sense to Stronk.
Today Great Scott and Stronk are going to work out with felled trees and maybe run up a snowy mountain and maybe run from an Oldsmobile and then maybe hoist a large bag of rocks in a barn.
Stronk is drinking forty cans of Liquid Stronkumms a day and feels near death most of the time but Stronk will continue to ‘TRUST THE PROCESS’ or else Stronk will never be huge again and Papa Best will hate Stronk and not be his Papa anymore.
These are challenging times for Stronk.
But at least Stronk has a great friend in Great Scott.