Dance Monkey Dance (HOFC 2)

Dance Monkey Dance (HOFC 2)

Posted on July 6, 2022 at 3:08 pm by Scott Stevens

Word has it the 4th Wahl sent a raven to me say that GOD wasn’t happy with my Cajun City Wrestling reference, but if he would’ve put me in-charge  instead of McKenna Blue it wouldn’t have failed.

But enough of about the Big Sleazy because I have a monkey I have to keep dancing for me to get his bananas.

It was real cute you compared me to a Jester. Did you get this while you and Bobbinette Carey were having a Netflix and Chill night and binge watching Bridgerton before she started pegging you with her kendo stick strap-on?

How you try to say I was a noble in a world full of royals but I was still the outsider looking in because I was still the joke of the company. Hate to break it to you bud, but I didn’t list off some of my job titles because I was trying to intimidate you. It’s to show you of the importance that GOD himself entrusts with me to help promote and expand the great land of High Octane which is something you know nothing about because all you do is collect a paycheck and take up valuable air time each week.

Xander, you really think bringing up our individual War Games performances is a slight against me.

Sigh.

Let’s really break it down.

I was one of the first guys in and you are right I didn’t eliminate anyone or help eliminate anyone. I was the second person eliminated, but whose team won?

Mine did.

You see Xander, you had weeks of training and preparation with your team, Joe Bergman, and everyone you could think of while I was unemployed living in the boiler room of the Best Arena living off of the scraps that catering throws out. While you were thinking of strategies I was looking for my next meal before I was kidnapped by the EPU and flown half way across the world in less than 24 hours and told I was competing in War Games because the same guy that fired me needed me. You heard that correctly.

Lee Best needed me and when he called I picked up the phone and answered the challenge.

You could’ve had a performance of the ages Xander but all that everyone remembers is Team Best won and Team Fuse lost.

You can call me a clown, but Lee Best in his time of need called me because he knows what I can do inside a caged environment and even though I didn’t eliminate anyone my short time in the cage was enough to ensure my team leaves the Ukraine victorious.

Remember Xander, no Best drafted you or called upon you because they know you are good for one thing…..sucking.

I’m ashamed of my shortcomings?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Bitch, my shortcomings in HOW are known around the world. Hell, there is this network called HOTv and you can find it at the very top of HOWrestling.com. Here is a link to it so you can watch my shortcomings without quitting like those quitters from FIGHT did. I’ve learned to embrace my shortcomings years ago and that’s made me a better wrestler. More importantly it has lead to me to become a champion multiple times over and it has lead to me the most importantly accomplishment of all, HOW Hall of Famer.

I don’t need to talk to anyone about anything especially Hollywood because if you challenged Hollywood when he’s not having his little midlife crisis right now he’d of superkicked your head in into the cage door and that’s an Executive Promise because Hollywood is dangerous in HOFC and you challenged him when he’s vulnerable.

What a real man you are.

Xander you still don’t get it do you.

I’m not complacent with being an executive, a champion, or even a Hall of Famer. I have been given a purpose by GOD almighty and that is to vanquish all Fisher Price wrestlers from High Octane Wrestling and you are at the top of the list. You talk about being afraid of clowns and that makes a lot of sense since the biggest clown of them all is the one that stares back at you on a daily basis from the mirror. You are your own worst enemy Xander. Constantly scared of accomplishing anything and at Chaos 2 when those doors close you will have no choice, but to dance like the monkey you are because your new phobia is called Scott Stevens.