The chorus of The Pretenders song “It’s a Thin Line Between Love and Hate” plays in the background as we go close up on a laptop computer that has just been turned on. A pair of hands wait impatiently as the unit fires up. The screen soon shows the Google page.
The hands begin to type on the laptop.
Female Voice: Okay. Let’s just see what’s going on.
“HIGH OCTANE WRESTLING RUMBLE AT THE ROCK” is typed into the search box and a number of selections pop up.
Using the mouse, the laptop scrolls down the news stories and websites with links to stories about RATR and the HOW website. Then a link pops up…
Female Voice (angry tone): What?
RAH LIVES FOR THE SUN-special to the San Francisco Chronicle.
Female Voice: What the fuck is this?
The mouse clocks on the link and the story pops up.
SAN DIEGO (DATELINE)—With High Octane Wrestling’s Rumble at the Rock at the former Alcatraz prison just days away, it’s not a huge shock that a sunshine god chooses to get ready for his final showdown with High Flyer in the eighty degree weather and bountiful sun drenched San Diego some five hundred miles to the south of San Francisco.
“Rah thought it was a no brainer,” the Sunshine God confirmed, heartily basking in the cool Pacific Ocean breeze at the Coronado Beach where Rah has been training for his match.
Did Rah have any concerns about his particular match- a General Population match?
“I told him that of all the matches, the General Population match was probably the best suited for him,” Rah’s wife Dawn McGill explained. “The Infirmary match, the Guard Tower match, the Prison Yard match, all can get a little rough and that’s just not Rah’s thing.”
If there was any sign of nervousness or anxiety on the part of Rah, you would be hard pressed to see it.
“Rah just wants to go to Alcatraz, defeat High Flyer, stick it to Sunny O’Callahan, and after the final bell, go on with his life outside of wrestling,” McGill said. “He’s done wrestling for over twelve years now and he’s ready to move on to the next part of his life.”
And that part includes McGill, herself a fifteen-year veteran of the wrestling game.
“I’ve retired, unretired, and retired again so many times in the past I’ve lost count. Wrestling was something I found hard to put away. But now I’ve finally made peace with putting pro wrestling in the past,” admitted McGill. “I’m ready this time to call it quits… for good.”
The reason for that?
“Rah has swept her off her feet,” the Sunshine God interjects. “And Dawn has swept Rah off his feet. I have finally found a purpose bigger than myself, love…”
Female Voice: ARRRRGHHHHHHHHHH!
Sitting at a table inside a downtown San Francisco hotel room, Sunny O’Callahan clicks out of the San Francisco Chronicle website where she found the news story with an extra added oomph on index finger as it pressed down on the mouse.
Sunny O’Callahan: No… No!… NO!
The blonde is not happy at what she’s just read.
Sunny O’Callahan: Un-fucking-believable.
Her hands shake with rage as if she feels the urge to the chuck the laptop at the wall.
Sunny O’Callahan: There’s NOTHING in that story about the person responsible for this whole thing… me- Sunny O’Callahan. Where was my phone call? Why didn’t someone interview ME! I’M the real star here. Not Rah. Me. Sunny O’Callahan. There’s no mention about how I- Sunny O’Callahan- singlehandedly rescued Rah’s career and got the Sunshine Goof booked into not one, not two, but THREE pay per view shows. There’s no mention how I also singlehandedly saved the career of High Flyer, Darin Zion, and now SCOTT STEVENS! Yeah, that’s right- I just saved Scott Stevens career. What else would explain why someone pulled Scott Stevens out from the Pool of Banishment to show up on HOW television again? So who’s really responsible for his ‘last HOW chance?’ That’s right. ME. You’re welcome Scott Stevens. You’re welcome.
Sunny pulls at her hair in frustration.
Sunny O’Callahan: There’s also no mention how me- Sunny O’Callahan- pulled off the greatest theatrical wrestling production in the history of pro wrestling called the Definitive Erasure. No mention on how I gave the HOW fans one of the most memorable moments in HOW history when I ran over Dawn McGill in a parking lot. None. Where is the story about me?
She pounds both fists down on the table.
Sunny O’Callahan: And dammit Rah! Where’s your gratitude towards me? How Sunny O’Callahan made you a lot of money this year… a LOT of money. That’s right Rah. You don’t wrestle Sutler Reynolds-Kael at March to Glory if it weren’t for me. You don’t wrestle Jace Parker Davidson for the HOTv title if not for me. You doesn’t wrestle High Flyer at Bottomline if not for me. And you would be sitting on a beach wasting away in Margaritaville and wasting your talent if it weren’t for me- Sunny O’Callahan- blasting his precious wife across a parking lot after a Jimmy Buffett show. Where is MY thank you? Why hasn’t Rah said ‘thank you Sunny for everything you’ve done for me?’ Huh? Well? I’m waiting Rah! Where the appreciation for everything I’ve done to you? Well, forget it. I don’t need your thanks because I already know that YOU know what I’ve done for him. That’s right. I know that you know that you owes me big time for everything that I’ve done for YOU. So Rah? You’re welcome. YOU’RE WELCOME!
Sunny’s a little disheveled tonight. Her hair is a complete mess and she’s wearing an old worn out button-down shirt.
Sunny O’Callahan: And then there’s YOU. Dawn McGill. The old hussy, has-been who specialized in sleazy, one-night stands with Cletus T. Johnson before she latched her fish hooks onto Rah. By the way, Dawny-poo. Cletus understands now just how much of a drag you were to the Kentucky Redneck Mafia when you…
She does the air quotes thing with her hands.
Sunny O’Callahan: …”managed” them. You didn’t do squat to help them win the MVW tag titles. They did it all by themselves. Now Dawn, with someone who actually knows what the hell she’s doing, the Kentucky Redneck Mafia appreciate what I- Sunny O’Callahan- bring to the table for both him and Enos. Dawn. You’re old news. You are the aging prima donna who doesn’t know when it’s time to leave. You are the aging boxer who’s taking too many punches and doesn’t know when to retire. You need to get it through your head that Dawn McGill is the past; Sunny O’Callahan is the future. What do I have to do to get it through your head that you simply need to go away? I HIT YOU WITH A MOVING VEHICLE FOR CHRIST’S SAKE! DID YOU NOT GET THE MESSAGE?
Sunny talks in a mocking voice.
Sunny O’Callahan: Oh. We’re in love. We’re doing this all for love. I love him. LOVE… LOVE… LOVE… ARRGHGGHHHHHHHH! ENOUGH! I’m NOT feeling the love. Oh, I’m feeling the HATE. HATE. HATE. HATE. HATE. This isn’t about YOU! It’s all about ME! ME! Sunny O’Callahan! I HATE YOU DAWN BECAUSE YOU ARE SCREWING UP EVERYTHING THAT I AM TRYING TO CREATE HERE! I HATE THAT YOU ARE MESSING WITH A MATCH THAT I HAVE SINGLEHANDEDLY MADE AND IS ABOUT TO TAKE PLACE AT RUMBLE AT THE ROCK HAPPEN! YOU HATE THAT I HAVE SINGLEHANDEDLY MADE RAH A BIGGER DEAL THAN YOU COULD EVER HAVE! AND I HAVE SINGLEHANDEDLY SAVED THE CAREER OF HIGH FLYER! THIS MATCH ISN’T ABOUT THEM… IT’S ALL ABOUT ME!
She points at a spot where she envisions an imaginary Dawn McGill is.
Sunny O’Callahan: YOU NEED TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY, DAWN! YOU ARE COMPLETELY FUCKING UP MY PLANS!
She suddenly stops and takes a long breath.
Sunny O’Callahan: So Dawn. If it’s not too much trouble, would you please just get the hell out of the way. Go home. I’ve taken your best shot. I’ve taken your daughter’s best shot and here I am. I’m still here. Don’t you get it? Nothing, and I mean nothing, is going to stop me from getting what I want. NOTHING! Dawn, I took you out with a vehicle. Yes, I DID ATTEMPTED VEHICULAR HOMICIDE TO GET YOU OUT OF MY WAY… WHATEVER! Don’t think for one second that I won’t hesitate to do it again if I have to. Just do us all a favor and just go home and let the wrestling finally appreciate my brilliance… the fact that I am the best manager ever in pro wrestling… the fact that I have the best wrestling mind ever in pro wrestling. Me.
Sunny seems to have calmed down now.
Sunny O’Callahan: And that brings us to High Flyer.
She shakes her head.
Sunny O’Callahan: Ezekiel 25:17 says: ‘The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is The Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.’
Sunny looks directly into the camera as if she’s looking directly at High Flyer.
Sunny O’Callahan: Sunny O’Callahan says: Flyer, you failed me once. At Bottomline, after I singlehandedly rejuvenated your fading career and got you into a pay per view match, you shouldn’t have done the job; you should have got the job done. I gave you one simple task- destroy Rah- and you didn’t get the job done. Now, Sunny O’Callahan gives you another chance. That’s right Flyer. Sunny O’Callahan is giving you a second chance to get the job done. Sunny O’Callahan is giving you a second chance at redemption and a second chance to show the wrestling world that you are still relevant. Sunny O’Callahan has graciously given you one last chance to prove that you are worthy of her attention. But don’t fail me Flyer. Don’t fail me. The last guy who failed me ended up in the Pool of Banishment. Remember Defective Marty Pratt? Right. NO ONE remembers who Defective Marty Pratt is because Defective Marty Pratt failed me in a most spectacular way when Darin Zion pinned him in just seven seconds at the Definitive Erasure. The last guy who crossed me was Rah and he ended up with a lawsuit against him. That’s right, after Rah fired me I went out and made his life a living hell for most of 2021. Dawn McGill crossed me too so I tried to run her over with a SUV. I think you get the picture here so High Flyer, if you can’t get the job done at Rumble at the Rock, if you even think about crossing me, you have no idea the lengths I- Sunny O’Callahan- willing to go… you have no idea what I am capable of doing to deliver my wrath. Win the damn match.
* * *
Meanwhile, down the coast in San Diego, Rah is in his office and reviewing his final statement before traveling up the coast to San Francisco…
AN OPEN LETTER FROM RAH
Once upon a time, Rah appeared in High Octane wrestling for the first time. It was July of 2010. Backstage interviewer Missy Andrews made the mistake of asking Rah who he was so Rah led everyone back to the back and Missy, much to her bewilderment and chagrin, had to introduce us a second time. Rah also remembers the first time Rah stepped into the HOW ring. It was against Bobbinette Carey and Rah remembers feeling very good after Rah defeated a HOW Hall of Famer in Rah’s first ever match.
Since then, Rah’s had some fun moments in HOW over the years and now it’s only fitting that on the final night of Rah’s wrestling career; the last time Rah will step through the ropes into a wrestling ring, that Bobbinette Carey will be wrestling on the same card at Rumble at the Rock.
Rah has enjoyed his time in HOW immensely. One of Rah’s favorite moments was the night Rah tagged with Kirsta Lewis eleven years ago in a match against Chris and Barbi Kostoff. Kirsta and Rah didn’t really hit it off that well. Actually Rah and Kirsta didn’t hit it off at all. But somehow we overcame that minor detail to pull out the win. Kirsta hit her Hells Bitch kick and Rah tagged myself in- much to Kirsta’s displeasure- to get the pinfall.
Rah’s second HOW run has been eventful. Rah never dreamed in a million years that Rah would face Michael Lee Best for the HOW World title. In fact, when Rah got the news, Rah immediately tried to escape to Canada. But it was a good match and the better man won.
While it was nice for Rah to get a title shot, Rah’s only goal when Rah returned to HOW was to have fun, to bring a little sunshine to HOW, and do the best Rah could in the ring. Was it all sunny and bright. No. In fact, it became too ‘sunny.’ Sunny O’Callahan, that is. Sunny dragged Rah into the dark over the past few months. Sunny coerced Rah into a feud with Sutler Reynolds-Kael after Rah cast her out of his entourage. Sunny filed suit against Rah. Sunny then corrupted High Flyer into doing her bidding. Rah endured some dark times- the darkest that Rah had ever face… well, besides the night Rah was annihilated in the ring by a giant wrestling panda… but Rah digresses. But out of the darkness came the light Rah never imagined would come into this life- Rah’s wife Dawn McGill. Rah returned to the light by helping Dawn turn away from the darkness that had consumed her for several years. In helping Dawn back to the light, Rah found the ‘one’- the person Rah wishes to spend the rest of his life with. Rah has found a new purpose. A new way to go.
You see, in order to bring more people to the light, Rah had to find his own light and get Rah’s life and priorities in order. Rah had to make his own bed.
Rah realized that that there was something missing. A partner. Someone to travel through life with. Rah needed a someone to help him get back to the light. That someone was Dawn McGill.
Finally, Rah realized that there is darkness in the world trying to pull Rah in. Rah knows that sometimes life is not fair and that you will let the darkness overcome you. But Rah believes if you can persevere when times are tough, face down and push back the bullies who would bring darkness into your life, and never, ever give up no matter what, then the darkness will never win.
At Rumble at the Rock, Rah must hurdle one last obstacle in the final match of his career. High Flyer.
High Flyer, it’s over. In desperation, you listened to the siren song of Sunny O’Callahan and sold your soul to the darkness. You drank from Sunny O’Callahan’s poisoned chalice. You heeded her dark words and condemned Rah for moving on with his life. You dared to pass judgment on the Sunshine God for the potential you feel Rah has wasted.
You called Rah soft.
You could not be more wrong.
The Rah you will see at Rumble at the Rock will be nothing resembling someone who’s ‘soft.’ You and Sunny O’Callahan attacked Rah. Sunny attacked my wife. There will be a price that must be and will be paid because in the end… hate never defeats love… darkness will never defeat the light.
High Flyer. At Rumble at the Rock, The Eye of RAHHH will render Rah’s final judgment on you.