The HOTv logo gives way to a live shot inside The All State Arena where once again we are coming to you live from Chicago for another edition of Refueled. The crowd is all on their feet as the cameras pan across the almost sold out arena.
The feed finally settles on a hard shot of our Hall of Fame announce crew, Joe Hoffman and Big Buff Benny Newell:
Joe Hoffman: Welcome everyone to REFUELED!!! Tonight we will see several important matches for several wrestlers who are vying for the right to wrestle at ICONIC on January 18th and …
Benny Newell: All the belts. That is what tonight is about. ALL THE DAMN BELTS.
Joe Hoffman: Well that is certa-
Benny Newell: It is the ONLY THING. Could you imagine if ALL THE BELTS belong to Max and Farthington……and NOT the SON??
Joe Hoffman: Well honestly I do not see the Hall of Fame Son of Lee Best caring as long as his stablemates hold all the belts. But I have a good feeling the Industry is going to have something to say about this.
Benny Newell: Hold on…one second.
Benny pauses as he reaches under his announcers desk and pulls a drink out. It is not his customary bottle of Jack Daniels….no sir.
Its a Long Island Iced T from Applebees.
Benny Newell: Before the show I made sure I got L.I.T!! But of course the service was complete shit and I did not leave a tip.
Joe Hoffman: No tip?
To prove it…Benny reaches into his pocket and holds up his receipt to the camera
Benny Newell: Only the GOD of HOW deserves a tith from me…
Joe Hoffman: Are you done? Seriously……what the heck is wrong with you?
Benny Newell: Sorry…maybe I should have sent that $34 to Utah……heard they are STRUGGLING over there…..at least thats what their script told me.
Joe Hoffman: Ok thats enough…we are moving on…..time for our first match!!!
Joe ignores Benny and the feed cuts away to the High Octane Vision screen as its time for our first match of the evening!!
Joe Hoffman: Alright folks…we are about to get our first look at-
Benny Newell: Crocodile Dundee?
Joe Hoffman: No Benny. Buck Yates.
Benny Newell: I might have taken some shrooms before we started this show…again…but I could have sworn that I saw Crocodile Dundee backstage.
Joe Hoffman: Benny, his name is Buck Yates and he is about to make his HOW debut. Let’s go to the ring and Bryan McVay for our first match of the night.
McVay is ready to go and Jace Savage is already in the ring.
Bryan McVay: Ladies and gentlemen. The following contest is for ONE FALL. Introducing first already in the ring- JACE SAVAGE!
Savage raises his hands up in his corner and gets a mild response from the audience.
Bryan McVay: And his opponent…
“Creepin” by Eric Church plays over the public address system inside the Allstate Arena.
Buck Yates enters the fray with a huge grin on his face reminiscent of Nicolas Cage as Castor Fucking Troy.
Bryan McVay: Hailing from Diwan, Australia…
Benny Newell: See Hoffhole! I told you he was Crocodile Dundee…DRINK!
Bryan McVay: He is the Diwan Forest Killer. Please welcome…BUCK YATES!
With a wipe of his nose from the back of his wrist, Buck makes his way down the ramp. Unflinching in his mannerisms, Buck now has a facial expression that emotes complete sinisterness.
Benny Newell: What the fuck? That’s not Crocodile Dundee!
‘The Diwan Forest Killer’ then fights hiw way into the ring from underneath the bottom rope, rather ungracefully.
Joe Hoffman: All right. Jace Savage has had a bad run of results here of late. Two weeks ago Brenton Cross defeated him at Refueled X. Tonight, we’re going to find out if he can turn things around against the newcomer to HOW, Buck Yates.
Benny Newell: *Phiffffftttt* I’ll bet you a hundred bucks Dundee guts and mounts Jace Savage on the mantle of his fireplace.
Joe Hoffman: It’s Buck Yates, Benny. Not Crocodile-…oh never mind. Joel Hortega is your referee for our first match of the night and this match is under way.
The bell rings and we’re off. Both men circle each other warily.
There’s a lock up. Savage takes a side headlock. Yates quickly counters and flings Savage to the ropes. Yates decks Savage with a stiff shoulder block upon his return and then follows with boots to the midsection. He then bends down and slams Savage’s head to the canvas repeatedly before Hortega comes over to admonish the Aussie. Yates waves him away – leans in even more and bites Savage’s ear. Hortega immediately counts…
Yates finally pulls up before Hortega gets to cinco. Giving the referee a stare of complete distain, Yates backs away as Savage gets back to his feet holding his ear.
Joe Hoffman: This guy is savage.
Benny Newell: No. The other guy is Jace Savage.
Joe Hoffman: You know what I mean.
Both men stare each other down and lock up. Yates uses his strength to drive Savage into a corner turnbuckle. Thumb to the eye causes Savage to cover said eye with one hand. Yates takes the other hand and Irish whips Savage across the ring to the opposite corner.
Joe Hoffman: Savage hits that turnbuckle hard.
Benny Newell: Just like I’ll be hitting some things hard later on tonight,
Yates sprints across the ring and drives his shoulder into Savage’s midsection and folds him up like a cheap lawn chair. Savage stumbles forward and drops to a knee. Yates rolls him up and Hortega is right there for the pinfall.
Savage gets a shoulder up.
Yates ambles around Savage and pulls him back up to his feet. He measures and then delivers a vicious knife edge shot to the throat that sends Savage down on his back.
Joe Hoffman: Knife edged throat punch by Yates.
Benny Newell (in the worst Australian accent ever): That’s not a knoife, mate. This is a knoife! DRINK!
Joe Hoffman: Yates is a hunter who calmly, coolly, and methodically stalks his prey.
Benny Newell: I can relate. I’m the same way when I go to the strip club.
Yates slowly brings Savage back to his feet again. Whip to the ropes sends Savage on the run again and Yates greets him with a big boot to the gut that drops him like a sack of potatoes once again. Immediate cover…
But Savage still has enough in the tank to get the shoulder up in time. Yates goes to drop an elbow…he pauses…and then drives the point of his elbow into Savage’s sternum. Savage clutches his chest and rolls back and forth.
Joe Hoffman: That was a nasty elbow drop.
Benny starts to respond but before the HOW Hall of Fame announcer can utter his retort, Yates hooks the leg and Hortega slides in again.
Joe Hoffman: Cover by Yates!
Tr- Yates pulls him up at the last second.
Joe Hoffman: Wait! Buck Yates pulls Savage up at the last second?
Yates isn’t done yet. He drives another big boot to the midsection and then turns Savage over on his stomach. Reaching around him, Yates picks him up and gutwrench suplexes Savage to the mat.
Joe Hoffman: Beautiful gut wrench suplex by Yates and he holds on to Savage!
Again, Yates pulls Savage off the mat in the gut wrench suplex position. This time, he parades around the ring with his opponent and then drives him to the mat with a second gut wrench suplex.
Joe Hoffman: TWO gut wrench suplexes by Yates! That seems to have taken the steam out of Jace Savage.
Benny Newell: Stick a fork in Savage. He’s done.
Benny examines his empty bottle of Jack Daniels.
Benny Newell: And so is this bottle. WAITRESS!
Joe Hoffman: That should do it. Will Yates go for the pinfall?
Instead, Yates rolls his opponent over and sits down, pulling both of Savage’s arms back and locked behind his knees before grasping Savage’s chin and pulling it back,
Joe Hoffman: Camel clutch by Yates and he’s really torqueing Savage’s neck.
Savage is in big trouble but he does not submit. So Yates ups the ante. He takes his fingers and places them inside Savage’s mouth and tries to pry it open as far as he can.
Joe Hoffman: I’ve heard about this maneuver. Yates calls this the Pretty Lips.
Benny Newell: It ain’t that pretty Hoffman. Where’s my bottle of Jack?
Savage quickly taps his hand on Yates’s leg and Hortega calls for the bell.
Joe Hoffman: Jace Savage taps out! Buck Yates will win his first HOW match.
Bryan McVay is in the ring to confirm the same.
Bryan McVay: Your winner at seven minutes and twenty-nine seconds…BUCK YATES!
Yates drags Savage over to the ring apron and pushes him off to the floor.
Joe Hoffman: Well. An impressive debut for Buck Yates here in HOW.
Benny Newell: I’d be more impressed if the waitress would bring me more Jack.
Joe Hoffman: We got to see a little of what Yates is all about. We’ll see what happens with him going forward.
A waitress arrives with a fresh bottle of Jack Daniels for Benny.
Benny Newell: Now THAT’S what I’m talking about.
Joe Hoffman: Earlier tonight, former two time HOW World Champion ‘Ordinary’ Joe Bergman returned to action for the first time since losing a brutal three-way Infirmary Match against new World Champion and ICON Champion Cecilworth Farthington and Dan Ryan. Bergman tagged with-
Benny Newell: RAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Joe Hoffman: …with Rah to defeat Adam Ellis and Marty Laslo in a dark match before Refueled XI. Bergman is with Blaire Moise backstage right now. Blaire.
HOW cuts to backstage.
Blaire Moise: Thanks Joe. I’m have ‘Ordinary’ Joe Bergman with me. Joe, first off welcome back. Good to see you back in the ring.
Joe Bergman: Thanks Blaire. Always a pleasure talking with you. Um…good to be back in the ring. It’s always fun when Rah and I tag together and especially with Dawn McGill comes along for the ride as well. Adam Ellis and Marty Laslo gave us a good match and we were happy to get the win tonight.
Blaire Moise: But why a dark match that no one will see?
Joe Bergman: Because as I mentioned two weeks ago, I’m starting at the bottom again and going to have to work my way back up. Tonight was a first positive first step to get the ring rust off and get back in the swing of things. Most of all, I wanted to just have fun wrestling again so that’s why I teamed up with Rah and McGill tonight.
Blaire Moise: So, we can look forward to more from you going forward?
Joe Bergman: Absolutely.
Blaire Moise: All right. Thanks Joe and we’ll see you soon.
Joe Bergman: Any time Blaire.
Blaire Moise: That’s all for now. Let’s cut to our first commercial break of the evening……did Scotty do the format tonight??
Back live and its time for our second match of the evening…
Joe Hoffman: Next up ladies and gentlemen is a confrontation between Brenton Cross and Noah Hanson.
Benny Newell: A bout between a wannabe time traveler and the man who knows the Colonel’s secret recipe. Sounds like a fucking bore fest to me.
Joe Hoffman: Maybe to you Benny, but this is an opportunity for these two to get back in title contention for either the LSD or ICON championships.
Benny Newell: It won’t matter because you can’t stop Skynet or the spicy chicken sandwich from selling out. These two will lose to the eMpire.
The lights in the arena go out and the HOV comes alive as a wormhole graphic with what appears to be a silhouette of someone falling through it with various images of war, famine, destruction, news clips and articles, etc. from movies and real life appear around it before the HOV suddenly shuts off.
Joe Hoffman: …..Ok.
Benny Newell: I should’ve popped some acid before seeing that shit show.
Smoke appears at the entrance as “COCHISE” by Audioslave hits the arena. Brenton Cross walks through the smoke, his eyes fixed on the ring.
Bryan McVay: Introducing first, from A Time Unknown… BRENTON CROSS!
Acknowledging nobody, he walks, focused down to the ring. He slides in; standing center ring then finally looks up to the crowd and soaks in the amazement.
Joe Hoffman: Brenton says he’s on a mission to prevent the upcoming apocalypse.
Benny Newell: Yeah right. Next, he’ll be asking for clothes, boots, and motorcycle.
As his music fades, “Killing In The Name Of” by Rage Against the Machine begins to play and Hanson steps from behind the curtain and out onto the stage.
Bryan McVay: And his opponent, he hails from Kansas City, Kansas and weighing in at 237 lbs…..NOAH! HAAAAAAAAAAANSSSSSSSOOOOOOONNNNN!!!!
Noah cracks his knuckles and neck before making his way down the ramp and towards the ring. Hanson doesn’t take his eyes off of his opponent once he reaches the end of the ramp. He slides into the ring the ring and quickly pops up ready for a fight.
Boettcher signals for the bell.
Joe Hoffman: And here we go.
Benny Newell: Too bad I can’t travel forward in time to the ending.
Cross and Hanson come out of their corners slowly before circling one another. Hanson goes to lock up but Cross goes for a punch instead.
Joe Hoffman: Cross with a punch, but the veteran, Hanson, avoids it and Cross looks surprised he missed.
Benny Newell: He’s from the future wouldn’t he know if his punch would’ve missed?
Hanson takes advantage of Cross’ blunder and sends a knee into his stomach to double him over before taking him to the mat with a snap mare and locking in a reverse chinlock. Boettcher checks on Cross to see if he submits but he says no.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson grounding the newcomer.
Benny Newell: Of course he is Hoffman. You don’t want him Quantum Leaping into the future now do you?
Cross reaches up and rakes the eyes of Noah Hanson and the former tag champion has no choice but to relinquish the hold.
Joe Hoffman: Underhanded, but effective move by Cross.
Cross spins around to a sprinting position as he watches Noah stumble back before charging at his opponent to deliver a running clothesline. Hanson bounces back up. Another clothesline by Cross and again Hanson pops back up, but instead of a clothesline, Cross doubles Hanson over with a kick to the gut.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson is gasping for air and Cross has him hooked.
Brenton picks up Hanson slightly before twisting over and delivering a neckbreaker.
Joe Hoffman: Cris-Cross Neckbreaker!
Benny Newell: Did he learn that from Daddy Mac or Mac Daddy?
Joe Hoffman: Huh? Cross just turned Hanson inside out.
Benny Newell: And being inside out is wiggida, wiggida, wiggida WHACK!
Joe Hoffman: What?
Benny Newell: DRINK!
Cross goes for the cover.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson gets the shoulder up before the count of three.
Benny Newell: No shit Hoffman. Bitcher showing why he’s the second worst ref in HOW to the guy who can’t speak English.
Cross goes to pick up Hanson but eats a boot for his trouble as the former tag champion grabs Brenton and delivers a sit-out spinebuster.
Cross with a shoulder up.
Joe Hoffman: Cross with the shoulder up in the nick of time.
Benny Newell: I see what you did there.
Hanson doesn’t allow Cross to get his bearings as he locks in a single leg Boston Crab.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson working over that leg.
Benny Newell: This Russian Bride I ordered will be working over something after the show and it won’t be my leg.
Boettcher asks if Brenton wants to submit, but the Chrono Soldier has other ideas as he begins to crawl to the nearest set of ropes. Hanson feels his opponent beginning to drag him backwards and he musters enough strength to place Cross’ leg over his shoulder.
Joe Hoffman: Stretch muffler by Hanson. What is Cross going to do now?
Benny Newell: Reverse time, duh.
Boettcher asks Cross again if he gives up and he says no. Cross able to use his momentum to roll up Hanson.
Hanson kicks out before the count of three and pops back up charging at Brenton and Brenton grabs Hanson by the front of his pants and pulls him forward and Hanson falls through the ropes and crashes onto the floor below.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson took a nasty spill and could be hurt.
Benny Newell: Just give him a drumstick or a part in a Marvel movie and he’ll be good.
Cross yells at Boettcher to begin counting as he stretches out his leg.
Hanson begins to stir.
Hanson is on all fours.
Hanson slides in before the official reaches the count of ten.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson makes in it!
Benny Newell: Barely.
Cross puts the boots to Noah before jumping up and hitting a picture perfect knee drop. Cross picks up Hanson and goes to whip him, but Noah reverses the momentum by pulling Cross towards him and doing so he drills Cross in the face with a discus elbow.
Joe Hoffman: MIRAKURU! MIRAKURU BY HANSON!
Benny Newell: I’ll settle with Jack that you very much.
Cross hits the mat and Noah slowly makes his way to the corner.
Joe Hoffman: Hanson could be looking for the Ladykiller. If he hits it that will be it.
Hanson steadies himself on the top rope before slowly rising and pointing down towards cross. He leaps off and out stretches the elbow.
Joe Hoffman: OH MY! NOAH CRASHED AND BURNED! CROSS MOVED OUT OF THE WAY!
Cross rolls towards the corner to avoid the attack and makes his way up to a vertical base and lifts up Hanson and whips him to the opposite corner and after Hanson hits the corner he stumbles backwards from the whiplash motion and Cross is able to run up the turnbuckles and fall backwards.
Joe Hoffman: Cross just reached eighty-eight miles an hour in the DeLorean because he just Time Traveled.
Benny Newell: Where we’re going we don’t need roads Hoffman. Drink.
Cross hooks a leg when he lands.
Boettcher signals for the bell.
Bryan McVay: And your winner by pinfall…BRENTON CROSS!
Joe Hoffman: Cross emerged victorious here tonight and should be him back on the path towards another title shot.
Benny Newell: I knew he would win. Bob Jared’s Chest Hair foresaw it.
Cross gets his hand raised in victory as we cut away…..
Refueled cuts backstage where Blaire Moise is standing by once again. The HOW Faithful in the Rosemont Horizon, because President David Palmer may say that you’re in good hands with Allstate but we like to keep it old skool, give High Octane’s NUMBER ONE interviewer a nice ovation.
Blaire Moise: Welcome back fans to the eleventh edition of Refueled! My guest at this time is one part of the tag team champions but, unfortunately, is unable to defend the belts tonight due to injury. Please welcome, Lindsay Troy!
A quick camera pan stage right reveals the Queen of the Ring, elbow brace in full effect, hands on her hips.
That nice ovation? Kick it up to 11.
Blaire Moise: Lindsay, we know you’ve been sidelined for a month now due to the eMpire’s actions at Refueled 9. How is your recovery going?
Lindsay Troy: I’m supposed to tell you that it’s going about as well as can be expected. But I’m not an easy patient to deal with, so my doctor’s concept of being “right on track,” in my mind, just means I’m well behind because I’m laid up in the first place.
Blaire Moise: That’s certainly understandable. Athletes want to compete, and your words at the last Refueled made it clear that you have your sights set on Mike Best…and he has his sights set on you.
Lindsay Troy: (chuckling) Yes, the heir apparent has a complex about not being the center of his daddy’s universe. Who would’ve thought Mike would care so much about that? We’re gonna get our chance to dance though, Blaire, because I can tell you two things: I’m gonna do whatever it takes to get my medical clearance. And I’m gonna get it by ICONIC.
Blaire’s eyes widen a little as Troy pauses for a beat.
Lindsay Troy: And when I do? (A smirk) Mike’ll wish he kept his fee-fees contained to his little pen and quill instead of trying to grind my elbow into dust.
With that, the Queen spins on her heel and takes her leave, and Refueled cuts to another commercial break.
97 Minute iron Man Match for the World Championship
Dan Ryan vs. Cecilworth Farthington©
LSD Championship Match
High Flyer vs. Maximillian Kael©
Back live inside the arena and Avenged Sevenfold’s This Mean War plays throughout the arena as Steve Solex makes his way through the curtain and onto the entrance ramp. Solex slowly makes his way to the ring, dodging any fan interaction. He takes the steps up to the apron, and walks across to the adjacent turnbuckle. He stands up on the second rope and hoists both of his fists into the air, taking in the adulation of the fans in attendance. He steps down and enters the ring through the second rope, and tests the ropes.
Bryan McVay: Making his the to the ring, please welcome….STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVE SOOOOOOOOOOOOLEX!
Joe Hoffman: Steve Solex looks like he means business after his promos this week. He’s tired of playing second fiddle here in HOW. This guy wants to continue to turn heads and build his resume. Someday he could hold gold in HOW.
Benny Newell: Global Force Gold?
Joe Hoffman: You’ve already enjoyed some Jack this evening.
Benny Newell: Gotta get ready to celebrate with my man who pre-gamed without me!!!!
“Perfect Insanity” by Disturbed blares over the PA. A black limo pulls out slowly from the back on the side of the ramp. The driver steps out of the limo and walks to the back. The driver opens up the back door and out comes Mr. Executive himself, Brian Hollywood. Hollywood is sporting black pants with a chain hanging down his side. His black boots all shined up as walks down the ramp completely ignoring the fans. Hollywood is more buffed up than before as he enters the ring. Hollywood stands there for a moment as he looks out at the crowd with a disgusted look on his face. Hollywood, as he is pumped up and ready to go, ends up pulling his white beater apart in opposite directions as the shirt is ripped in half. Hollywood throws it at some fan as Hollywood flips the fan off as he awaits his opponent as he leans up against the turnbuckle.
Bryan McVay: Making his way from Hollywood, California; please welcome BRIIIIIIIIAN HOOOOOLLLLLYWOOD.
Hollywood stumbles off the turnbuckle, still looking like he’s enjoyed partying the last night, looking rusty. Torn almost about the LSD title scene. Joel Hortega turns to ring the bell. Solex rushes to hit a belly to belly suplex on Hollywood, but Hollywood slaps Solex’s ears, discombobulating him. Angrily, Solex charges Hollywood who immediately hits a drop toe hold on him.
Benny Newell: Hollywood wrestles better hangover than you annouce Joe Hoffman.
Joe Hoffman: Hollywood looks a little rusty. You can tell something is bothering him tonight.
Benny Newell: Nonsense! After Zion lost last refueled…everything’s perfect!
Hollywood taunts the crowd. He slaps Solex around a couple times before Solex grabs him and rolls him up with a small package.
Hollywood kicks out. Hollywood stands up and nails a termination kick straight to Solex’s jaw. He makes the quick cover.
Joe Hoffman: These two keep exchanging quick covers! This is madness!
Benny Newell: Both men are thirsty….for opportunity. Perverts!
Frustrated, Solex gets to his feet and nails a stiff clothesline. He picks Hollywood straight up and hits a Tiger Suplex on him. Hollywood struggles to get to his feet. He drops and elbow before grinding his forearm on his face. Solex quickly kicks Hollywood across his face a few times, before He locks in the Camel Clutch. Hollywood struggles for a moment with the pain in his back. He slow crawls towards the turnbuckle. He finally grabs the ropes and Hortega quickly counts for release:
Solex releases the ropes and argues with the referee for a moment. Hollywood rushes from out of nowhere and nails a Papercut straight to Solex planting his face stiff to the mat.
Joe Hoffman: It’s over!!!!
Benny Newell: It’s not time to bring out the Cuervo for the celebration, Hollywood barely misses the win with that kick out.
Hollywood grabs Solex and lands a huge, stiff German Suplex dropping Solex on his head. Solex clutches his head as he rolls out of the ring. Hollywood’s frustrated and jumps right out of the ring. Adrenaline flows through Solex’s veins and he quickly shoulder tackles Hollywood and irish whips him into the corner. Solex rolls in and pumps the crowd up. Solex amps up the crowd and rushes towards the apron. He signals for the most brutal flying move in professional wrestling: the DOUBLE AXE HANDLE!
Benny Newell: NOOOOOO! DON’T YOU’LL GET KILLED!
Joe Hoffman: Brian Hollywood missle dropkicks him straight in the stomach. The one time Solex goes for something to please the crowd…
Benny Newell: He should have worn a helmet before attempting that. He never goes off for air time EVER!
Joe Hoffman: That’s how bad he wants to beat Hollywood and get the recognition he deserves!
Hollywood send Solex into the barricade. He then tosses him straight into the ring. Hollywood climbs up to the top turnbuckle and signals for as he’s about to jump off the turnbuckle, Hollywood sees Solex struggling to his feet. Hollywood mocks Solex and prepares to do his patented Double Ax Handle, as he comes down to hit, Solex ducks, kicks Hollywood square in the stomach and nails a perfectplex from out of nowhere on him.
Joe Hoffman: Solexplex on Hollywood for that mistake….will it cost him….Hortega’s counting….
DING DING DING!
Bryan McVay: Here is your winner of the match via pinfall……STEEEEEEEEEEEVE SOOOOOOOOLEX!
Benny Newell: Hollywood’s rust got to him as Solex got to Hollywood’s pride.
Joe Hoffman: He definitely used that mistake to his advantage for a creative finish to this match.
We see replays of the match before the cameras focus straight on Solex celebrating in the ring. Solex extends his hand down towards Hollywood to show respect. Hollywood scoffs at the kind gesture and gets out of the ring as Steve Solex celebrates before we cut away.
Backstage in the office we see Lee Best, the GOD of HOW, sitting in a chair with microphones in his face. He sits forward and smiles as he folds his hands.
Lee: It is pretty clear to me tonight that I need more help around here. With everything that my Son is going thru and knowing his grand plans…….and its a must that we beef up the staff around here. Scottywood has done a great job but there is no way I can count on his drunk ass on a weekly basis. So with that in mind……and it should not be a surprise at all considering how much this Hall of Famer was helping when we kicked off this Refueled Era…….it is time to officially introduce the newest member of the staff and the Number Two wrestling mind in the company back into the fold…….HALL OF FAMER CHRISTOPHER AMERICA!!
Stepping into the scene Christopher America stands next to Lee. He smiles as the two shake hands.
Lee: Now before we go too deep into what America will be doing come January….let it be known…..that whatever happened at Rumble at the Rock is behind us and America’s wrestling days are behind him. His sole focus will be behind the scenes and towards the betterment of the company as a whole. I cannot wait to officially start the–
Voice: Hey Lee!!!
The two men look up as Kostoff flies into the scene and begins laying rights to the face of America as Lee falls onto the couch up against the near wall.
Lee: What the fuck???? You motherfucker….
Lee stands up and starts at Kostoff, but the HOW Hall of Famer kicks at Lee to hold him back. America gets to his feet as Kostoff drives his knee into the sternum of America doubling over. Kostoff quickly gets him up and drives him down into the top of Lee’s massive mahogany desk with a power bomb. The sound of air escaping the lungs of America is audible as Lee looks at shocked.
Smiling, and staring at Lee the whole time, Kostoff begins to pound away on America’s face as he holds his head up with his left hand.
Finally, security comes rushing in and grabs a hold of Kostoff as Lee gets to his feet. The big man pushes several of them off of him again but they learned their lessons from last week and the numbers are too great. They finally get Kostoff down to his knees and forcibly apply handcuffs to his hands. As they lift him back to his feet, Kostoff spits in the area of Lee.
Lee: Get this fucking bum out of here…..
Kostoff: I’m coming for ya Lee.
As the security drag Kostoff out of Lee’s office all we can hear is the maniacal laughter of a man obsessed with finally ending this 18 year feud.
Just as Kostoff is out in the hallway, he turns around and gets nailed by the butt end of a baseball bat held by Austin Reeves and drops to the ground, out cold.
Reeves then head butts a security guard and lands big right hands on the other two security guards leaving all three out cold on the ground next to Kostoff.
Reeves With a cocky smirk on his face: Riddle me this, riddle me that, who just got fucked up, by a baseball bat?
Lee comes rushing out of the office…worried that Kostoff has broken free….and instead he sees Reeves and begins to smile.
Reeves: Kostoff, you can forget about coming for Lee cause I’m coming for you. That’s right, Austin Fucking Reeves wants one more dance with the Big Bad Kostoff!
Reeves looks at Lee stares the GOD of HOW down before turning back to Kostoff.
Reeves: This is all your fault Kostoff, you caused all this. These 3 poor bastards are out cold, you’re bleeding like fuck. It’s all your fault, right?
Reeves goes to one knee next to Kostoff while staring at him before looking at Lee again..
Reeves: It’s all his fault, right Boss?
Lee smirks and nods in approval at the sight of a bloody Kostoff at the hands of Reeves.
Reeves: You’re not the monster around here asshole, I am! Get ready, we’re going to have one last dance.
Lee: ICONIC…..fucking ICONIC
The scene cuts away as we fade out.
Back live and backstage we go…big surprise as the camera pans around a pretty quiet backstage area. Rare for HOW, in fact. Blaire Moise is seen with an unknown assailant and there seems to be a scuffle going on. Tensions are flaring up before all of a sudden, Brian Hollywood walks up looking rather concerned. He approaches the unknown man and Blaire and proceeds to get in the middle of the scene.
Brian Hollywood: Hey!…there a problem here?!
The tension stays the same as the unknown man just stares at Hollywood. He looks rather irritated as he didn’t want to be interrupted. The man gets right up in Hollywood’s face. Hollywood, who seemed to sporting a 5 o clock shadow and an edgier look, doesn’t back down…despite his match up earlier on in the night. The man, knowing that Hollywood isn’t going to concede to his fear tactics, proceeds to start mouthing off to Hollywood.
Unknown Man: Yea, as a matter of a fact…YOU’RE the fucking problem! Can’t you see that I’m trying to conduct my own business with the lady?!
Blaire doesn’t say a word as she looks towards Hollywood for a brief moment and actually shows him a concerned look as Hollywood takes notice. Hollywood looks back at the man and eyes him through his very soul.
Brian Hollywood: You know, I think your business with the lady is over with. The way I see it, you’re being a little too overly aggressive here. Now the way I see it, this can end one of two ways…
The man immediately gets all threatening and starts to get into a defensive posture. The man eyes Hollywood right back as the anger deepens within him.
Unknown Man: Do you have any idea who the fuck I am?! I’m not someone to be triffled with around here!
Hollywood raises an eyebrow as a sarcastic look crosses his face, rather than someone who is even stirred by the man.
Brian Hollywood: Does it look like I give a fuck who you are? Now I don’t know who you are or care to know who the fuck you are…but I think it’s time you leave before I make you leave.
Now the man is really getting pissed. It wasn’t custom for someone to threaten him…it’s always been the other way around. This is what he was good at. Manipulating people and using fear to get what he wanted. Now the tables are turned on him and this is turning into an unpredictable situation. Hollywood wasn’t really showing much emotion…which here lately was surprising. He usually had a tell…if he wanted people to know what it was without really letting people know what it was…if you catch the mini tangent there. However, here Hollywood was…not batting an eye or showing any tell of emotion. Hollywood was just standing there toe to toe with the man before Blaire finally gets in the way and says something.
Blaire Moise: Now come one guys this isn’t a big —
The man all of a sudden cuts her off as he gets really upset now and proceeds to grab Blaire strongly by the arm. This is where Hollywood, without a seconds hesitation, quickly grabs the man’s right arm and swipes it behind his back as the man gasps in pain.
Unknown Man: HEY!! WHAT THE FUCK!! YOU JUST DISLOCATED MY SHOULDER YOU FUCKING PRICK!
Hollywood doesn’t give a fuck. Obviously. He continues to apply pressure on the man’s arm before he leans in and gives the man a stiff warning.
Brian Hollywood: Now listen here…I’m only going to say this once…you come near or even give any kind of residential threat to Blaire here….you’re going to have worse than a dislocated shoulder! I don’t want to find out you’re bothering her again…and believe me…I WILL find out! It’s what I do….ya understand?
The man scoffs briefly but has no other choice but to submit to Hollywood’s demands. The man nods his head without saying another word. Hollywood finally releases the man and pushes him back as he holds his ground. The man holds his shoulder and points at Hollywood for a moment, but doesn’t say another word as he finally rushes off camera and heads out of sight as Hollywood watches him leave until he’s out of view. Blaire then turns to Hollywood and lets out a sigh and proceeds to thank him even though she’s not used to seeing this side of Hollywood.
Blaire Moise: I…I don’t know what to say Mr. Hollywood…but thank you…
Brian Hollywood: Has that guy been a problem for you lately?
Blaire Moise: He’s just a stalker, manipulative bastard who can’t seem to understand what the word no means.
Brian Hollywood: I see. Well…if he ever continues to be a problem for you…you let me know. In the meantime…
Hollywood pulls out a card from his inner suit jacket pocket and hands it to Blaire.
Brian Hollywood: I’m sure you’ve heard of Hollywood Enterprises. I know a lot of people don’t know what it’s all about…and that’s the point. But maybe it’s time people really understands what it is I actually do there. Let’s just say I have a way of fixing people’s problems…have a way of making them vanish…let’s just say it’s something I’ve recently decided to bring about in the public eye.
Blaire looks at the card as her eyes widen with shock. No way in the world did she know this side of Hollywood. Perhaps that was the whole point as Hollywood always kept his personal business close to the chest. Now that he’s picked now off all times and places to reveal this shocking side to him, there was no saying what could happen next…especially in HOW for Hollywood’s direction. All that was known was that Hollywood knew more than he let on when it came to people and their personal problems. Was this just a timely choice on Hollywood’s part? Or was he actually choosing to reveal this in his grander scheme of things? Hollywood cracks just a slight smirk but stays, for the most part, completely emotionless as he pats Blaire’s shoulder.
Brian Hollywood: Just remember, Blaire, it doesn’t matter what the situation or what the cost…I ALWAYS get shit straightened out and that’s what I plan on doing in HOW from this point forward. It’s time for a new direction here in HOW and it’s about time I start looking into other people’s problems…and believe me…there’s a lot of them here in the land of High Octane that, whether people want to admit it or not, needs fixing. I’ll be seeing ya Blaire…
Hollywood adjusts his suit jacket across his plain white shirt and no tie as he walks with purpose down the hallway mysteriously as the show pans elsewhere..
Backstage we see Brenton Cross walking down the hallway followed by Dr. Michaels and a security guard. After a quick moment we see him reach a partially closed door with a name plate on it that reads “Scott Woodson”. Brenton knocks on the door as he pushes it open and we can see the 49% Owner of HOW, Scott Woodson sitting behind a desk.
Scott Woodson: Come on in Brenton….and do not worry…my office is a SAFE place……unlike my peer……Mr. Best
Brenton makes his way into the room and takes a seat across from Woodson who has on an all white suite except for his #97Red tie, dreads pulled back and his hands hidden from view of the camera under the desk.
Brenton Cross: What can I do for you Mister Woodson?
Scott Woodson: Well first Brenton I’d like to congratulate you on a far fought win against a very game Noah Hanson tonight. You might think of him as an “Old Hand” but those old vets can be the most dangerous sometimes… you never know when you might just catch them on a night when the channel some of that energy from their prime…
Brenton Cross: Well thank you Mister Woodson… seem that things are now on track with my contingency plan after my loss to Max Kael…
Brenton looks over his shoulder at Dr. Michaels who just stares back with a concerning look as Brenton peddles what he believes is a delusion.
Scott Woodson: You gave Max a hell of a fight… something that isn’t easy to do. He is… a dang good wrestler. Someone your Doctor there would have a field day with too I’m sure. But the real reason I wanted to bring you in here tonight was to invite you to something very special on the next Refueled… If you can get a day pass from the good Doctor there.
Dr. Michaels: If it is for his wrestling, we can make arrangements I’m sure.
Scott Woodson: Very good… because next week I am hosting a new show out there in the ring… The Penalty Box… and I would like you Brenton to be my very first guest. You’ve been on quite a roll here in HOW and I would like the fans to get to know more about you. Whether that is Brenton the time traveler… or Brenton the wrestler.
Brenton Cross: That sounds great to me. An opportunity to educate the people about their futures… try to set them all on the right timeline to save the…
Dr. Michaels places his hand on Brenton shoulder… and Brenton pauses as he shoots a glare back at the doctor.
Brenton Cross: Or we talk about my ambitions here in HOW… my plans for what is next for Brenton Cross. Maybe what ICONIC will have in store for me.
Scott Woodson: We are only twenty-nine days away from the biggest show of the year for HOW. A stage that everyone in HOW wants to be on… and I got an idea for you that I think you’ll love.
Brenton Cross: Sounds great to me Mister Woodson, I’ll see you next week in the Penalty Box.
Scott Woodson: Awesome Brenton… and congrats again for beating Hanson tonight.
Cross nods his head as he stands up from the desk and extends his hand to shake… but Woodson just nods his head as Cross remembers the conditions of his hands and makes his way out of the office leaving Dr. Michaels at the door for a moment.
Dr. Michaels: Refueled Twelve shouldn’t be a problem. I believe that Brenton will continue to make great progress with…
Scott Woodson: Listen here Doc… I don’t give a fu…fudge about your quack practice that you have snagged Brenton into. This is HOW and a time traveler is far from the strangest thing that I have seen here over the past decade. So you just make sure that Brenton is here for The Penalty Box and we won’t have any problems…
One of Woodson’s dreads fall into his face as he takes a deep breath and pushes it back behind his ear.
Scott Woodson: Now you have a wonderful night Doctor, thanks for… well whatever you’re doing.
Dr. Michaels nods his head… knowing this isn’t a battle he wants to pick as he exits the office as Mister Woodson raises his bandaged hands from under the desk and lightly rubs his right palm as the camera cuts back to ringside for our next match of the evening.
Joe Hoffman: We’re back folks and ready for the biggest singles match of the night. A feud that has been brewing for four years since ICONIC 2015 when…
Benny Newell: No Joe! We’re not going to mention that blasphemous match tonight.
Joe Hoffman: Well it’s been brought up both wrestlers constantly over the past two weeks.
Benny Newell: Mainly Stevens.
Joe Hoffman: Maybe because it was Scott Stevens who defeated Mike Best at ICONIC 2015 for his second HOW World Title and Mike Best has never avenged that loss.
Benny Newell: Until tonight when Mike avenges Stevens’ out of existence. Plus do I need to remind you of the other details from that match?
Joe Hoffman: I’d suggest not after the hot water you got is in last week. The fact is the words between these two have been vicious… the emotions high and this match has all the making of a classic.
Benny Newell: A classic waste of time. Declare Mike the winner now and let’s move on to the next so called wrestler that Mike Best is going to destroy in the name of HOFC.
The lights in the arena go pitch black, as red lasers and spotlights light up the area as a guitar begins.
Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked” by Cage the Elephant
The video screen lights up and flashes across the screen a Texas flag, with the words, “Texas Born. Texas Bred.” “Texas Forever.“ branded into the flag. Jeers fill the Allstate Arena as on the HOV we see a giant hand that slowly closes into a FIST as letters slowly appear and form a message and that message reads in bold, capitalized letters… SCOTT STEVENS.
Bryan McVay: The following match is scheduled for one fall and is for the unsanctioned HOFC Championship. Now making his way to the ring from The Great State of Texas, weighing in at 256 pounds…SCOTT! STEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEENS!
A spotlight shines towards the top of the entrance ramp and Scott Stevens appears from behind the curtain, and as soon as he makes his way to the edge of the stage golden pyro begins to rain down behind him as he raises up his right fist high into the air as he holds his ribs with the other hand. He starts to walk slightly gingerly to the ring as he is showing some slight signs of his fight with Scottywood.
Joe Hoffman: This is the first time we have seen Scott Stevens since his brutal battle with Scottywood at the extended Rumble at the Rock 9 show nearly a month ago and it’s shocking to see him ready for action again already after what those two went through.
Benny Newell: Really? Woodson was out of the hospital only two weeks after the match… and he was crucified.
Joe Hoffman: Yes, but he was never looking to be cleared to wrestle… we have no idea what kind of shape Scott Woodson is really in right now. We’ve only seen him backstage in his office.
Stevens slowly makes his way around the ring, flipping off the crowd as he reaches the nearest set of ring steps and proceeds to enter the ring. Once inside, Stevens goes to the nearest corner; looking out amongst the crowd before raising the two unofficial state birds of Texas as a loud chant erupts from the crowd.
“FUCK YOU, STEVENS!” Clap, Clap, Clap, Clap, Clap.
Joe Hoffman: Seems like Stevens is happy to be back here in Chicago…
Benny Newell: Shitting all over the city that made this company what it is… Fuck You Stevens!
The barrage of Stevens bashing in interrupted by a slow guitar riff followed by some very familiar lyrics sung by Small Town Titans.
You’re a mean one, Mister Grinch
You really are a heel
You’re as cuddly as a cactus
and as charming as an eel, Mister Grinch
You’re a bad banana, with the greasy black peel
Just face the music, you’re a monster
Your heart’s an empty hole
Your brain is full of spiders
You got garlic in your soul
I wouldn’t touch you with a
thirty-nine and a half foot pole.
Finally after some of the Chicago crowd has started singing along, the always polarizing wrestling veteran steps out slowly onto the stage, dressed in his selfie jacket and a Santa hat to match his festive theme music. Also over his shoulder he is holding a red sack that seems to have “presents” inside of it.
Bryan McVay: And making his way to the ring from Chicago… The unsanctioned HOFC champion and Son of GOD… MIIIIKE BEEEEEEST!!!!
As he saunters toward the ring, Mike makes a big show of making sure the camera gets a good zoomed in shot of the HOFC title around his waist, before displaying his Hall of Fame ring prominently.
Joe Hoffman: Seems like we are joined by jolly ole Saint Mike for tonight’s match.
Benny Newell: He’s more than a Saint, he fucking ChristPlow, the Son of GOD, the…
Joe Hoffman: I get it Benny… I was just trying to say Mike is in a festive mood.
Benny Newell: Because he was visited by the GREATEST ghost of all time.
Joe Hoffman: Right… well we all wish that GREAT SCOTT visited and gave you the same advice before last show…
Mike approaches the apron, rolling under the bottom rope and standing to his feet in the ring. Michael slowly makes his way toward his corner, placing his bag of “gifts” down before stretching and preparing for the beginning of the match as his music begins to quiet and fade away. Rick Stevens takes the HOFC Title as he goes to raise it above his head, but before he can….
Gunter glieben glauten globen
Joe Hoffman: Who is this?
The intro chorus of “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)” by The Offspring hits as the Chicago fans are also totally lost until two words flash on the HOV in #97Red Times New Roman font.
And with that the 49% Owner of HOW makes his way out onto the stage dressed in an all white suit with #97Red tie. Dreads pulled back and his hands still wrapped in bandages as he slowly marches down to the ring ignoring the half cheers from the fans who are expecting anarchy from the new boss of HOW.
Joe Hoffman: And that is Scottywo… I mean Scott Woodson making his way out… for what could be fireworks with both Stevens and Mike Best in that ring.
Stevens keeps an eye on both Woodson and Best as the new boss makes his way down to the ring as his new music fades.
Scott Woodson: Hold on Stevens… and not you Scott. Rick, that HOFC title is not sanctioned by HOW and I will not allow you to raise it in the air as if it is really on the line here tonight.
Benny Newell: Two Scotts… Two Stevens… we just need Lee Best and Michael Norcia out here to make shit real confusing….
Scott Woodson: Furthermore… I am out here to ensure that this match is contested under normal rules… after what happened last show when Rick Stevens was knocked out. Insurance companies aren’t happy Mike when we aren’t paying for No Disqualification rule premiums and you’re caning people like we’re in some Singapore prison.
We can see a smirk on the face of Mike Best as Woodson makes his way around the ring and over to the announce table where the ring crew has just brought over a third chair and headset.
Scott Woodson: Now Stevens, enjoy your “gift” for beating me at Alcatraz. Let’s see if The Scorpion can pull off some deja-vu and take another title… all-be-it unsanctioned, from Mike Best.
With that Rick Stevens rings the bell to start the match as there is no collar and elbow tie up, but just bare fists being exchanged between the two men that have never seen anywhere close to eye to eye. Mike Best breaks up the back and forth though with a knee to the gut as he throws Stevens into the ropes and goes for a quick knee to the head of Stevens who grabs the grabs to halt himself before reaching back to Mike. But Mike charges at Stevens and clotheslines The Scorpion over the top rope and to the floor right in front of the announce table.
Joe Hoffman: You’re just getting yourself settled here Mister Woodson, and Scott Stevens is already dumped out in front of the table.
Scott Woodson: Hard knocks opening to the match here. Would like to see the boys not use the closed fist strikes… but this is a match full of emotion Joe.
Mike exits after Stevens at Rick starts his ten count while Mike grabs Stvens and throws him into the ringside barricade and then proceeds to stomp a mudhole through the Texan.
Joe Hoffman: A match between two men that you have had several… we’ll say disagreements with over the years.
Scott Woodson: Those were HIS disagreements Joe… I have no problem with Scott or Michael.
Benny Newell: Come on Scotty… be honest, you wanna see Mike destroy the man that crucified you at Alcatraz.
Scott Woodson: It’s Mister Woodson…. And I’m out to make sure this match stays on the tracks… and to babysit you. Do you know how many sponsors I had to talk to over the past two weeks. You’re welcome for still having a job by the way. Lee loves your drunken as… butt.
Rolling back into the ring for a hot second at an eight count to break it is Mike before he grabs Stevens and throws him into the steel steps, dislodging them as the crowd partly roars for Mike who seems to barely care, only cause it is Chicago. Stevens grabs his leg in pain as Mike sees an opening and starts stomping away on it. Rick is up for a six count again as he goes to…
Scott Woodson: Get him in the ring Mike!
Benny Newell: He has a ten cou….
Scott Woodson: Don’t Benny… just sit there and drink your Long Island Iced Tea… which you didn’t even off me and get drunk like you always do while Lee pays you.
Benny Newell: Kettle calling the…
Scott Woodson: Have I had a drink at all today? No. Because I am working. At a job. Getting paid. It’s a concept I know you have never thought of… so again… don’t Benny.
Joe Hoffman: You wanna call more matches with us Mister Woodson?
Mike reluctantly rolls Stevens back into the ring and breaks the ten count at nine wanting to make sure he beats Stevens without any questions or debate. Mike goes for a figure four submission move but as he grabs Stevens good leg he gets a boot in the side of the head once, then twice as it staggers Mike backwards for a second. Enough for Stevens to roll to the ropes and pull himself to his feet as Mike comes back and chop blocks Stevens back down to the mat.
Scott Woodson: That would be two minutes for tripping Mike… and a borderline move in HOW…
Benny Newell: How did the Rangers do tonight Mister Woodson? If we’re discussing hockey…
Mister Woodson shoots Benny a dirty look as Mike grabs the bad left leg of Stevens and slams it down knee first into the mat. Stevens rolls over onto his back as Mike goes to mount him for a fury of MMA shots but Stevens gets the feet into Mike’s mid section and sends Mike back right into Rick Stevens bumping the ref through the ropes to the outside, landing awkwardly
Joe Hoffman: Rick Stevens down!
Mike snarls at Stevens as he lays a boot straight in the side of Stevens’ head as he looks back at Rick laid out on the mat outside the ring… then at his red bag still in the corner of the ring.
Benny Newell: And Mike is reaching for his sack!
Scott Woodson: This is… one reason… why we have never won an Emmy….
Grabbing the red bag we see Mike pull something that he starts wrapping around his right hand.
Benny Newell: GREAT SCOTT’S chain!!!
Scott Woodson: Nope… that’s not happening here tonight…
Mike finishes wrapping the chain as Woodson removes his headset and heads towards the ring. Stepping up onto the apron he orders Mike discard the chain. That he isn’t going to allow him to use it on Stevens tonight. Mike takes another step towards Stevens, which forces Woodson to enter the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Now we got Scott Woodson and a chain wielding Mike Best in the ring together…
Benny Newell: He only owns 49%… he can’t fire you Mike… lay him out!
The crowd is roaring for a moment as the two Hall of Famers stand off in the ring until it is broken by a smile and a nod of the head from both as Mike unwraps and discards the chain from his hand. Boos start to rain down from the crowd who wants to see Stevens’ blood spilled tonight.
Joe Hoffman: This match could have just detriotated into a hardcore brawl… but it was stopped by Scott Woodson… I never thought I’d say those words….
Mike turns back to Stevens but the delay as allowed Stevens to recover enough that he grapevines the right leg of Mike Best, dragging him down to the mat for a leg bar submission hold as he cranks on the knee as Mike winces in pain and fight for the ropes. Battling with everything he has, Mike stretches for the ropes while Woodson asks if he wants to tap out. Mike vehemently refuses has he claws himself across the mat. Getting closer and closer as Stevens wrenches on the knee harder and harder.
Joe Hoffman: We could see Mike Best tap out right here and lose his HOFC Title to Scott Stevens….
Benny Newell: Fuck that Joe… Mike would rather die than tap out to Stevens.
Again Woodson asks Mike if he wants to tap but you see Mike mouth the words “fuck you” as he inches closer to the ropes. Just finger tips away Mike nearly dislocates his shoulder to get his hand on the bottom rope as Woodson calls for a break of the hold. But Stevens, determined to snap Mike’s knee refuses to let go….
Knowing that Woodson will DQ him, Steven reluctantly releases the holds as he stands himself back up before stomping Mike in the back once… twice… three times before he rolls him over onto his back and pulls him away from the ropes by his legs. Then with a swift fluid motion he locks in the sharpshooter on Mike in the center of the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Arachnophobia locked in by Stevens!!!
Mike Best again winces in pain as Stevens sits down as low as he can, twisting the back and knees of Mike. Again Woodson asks Mike if he wants to tap as he screams a resilient “NO” back as he again starts the process of pulling himself to the bottom rope.
Joe Hoffman: That leg bar seemed to take everything out of Mike in his effort to get to that rope… I don’t know if he can do it again…
Benny Newell: Ye of little faith in the Son of GOD… especially during this time of the year.
Inching closer and closer, Mike is not going down without a fight as he gets closer and closer to the ropes. But he starts to fade… you can see his eyes almost roll into the back of his head from the pain as Stevens keeps trying to apply as much pressure as possible. Mike only inches away from the rope goes to reach out with his last gasp as his body goes limp….
Joe Hoffman: Mike has pass….
Benny Newell: MIKE!!!!!
Scotty goes to call for the bell… but Mike has a sudden surge of energy as he reaches out for the bottom rope….
Joe Hoffman: Stevens stands up and pulls Mike back to the center of the ring!!!
Benny Newell: Fuck you Stevens! This can’t happen!!!
Stevens goes to sit back down to fully on the sharpshooter but Mike is able to twist his body back under Stevens and connects with an elbow to the bridge of Stevens’ nose. The shock forces Stevens to let go of Mike’s legs as the eight time World champ grabs onto the ankles of Stevens and pulls him down to the ground as he hops up onto his feet with likely pure adrenaline.
Benny Newell: Praise be to Mike Best! Fucking non-believer Joe!
Joe doesn’t even try to engage Benny as Mike who has both of Stevens’ legs in his hands starts stomping away at the head of Stevens over and over, even busting one of The Scorpion’s wounds back open from Alcatraz before he twists his legs and rolls Stevens over into his own submission move.
Joe Hoffman: Arachnophobia now locked in on Stevens!!!!
Benny Newell: Tap to your own move bitch!!! Tap!!!!
Stevens tries to pull himself to the ropes but as he pushes himself up the pain in his left leg causes him to collapse back to the mat where Mike Best wrenches back even harder on the back and knees of Stevens now. Now asking Stevens if he wants to tap, the Scorpion tries to push the words no out of his mouth… but he can’t find them….
Benny Newell: It’s over!!! Stevens taps!!!!
DING DING DING
Joe Hoffman: He does, Scott Stevens taps out to Mike Best in his own move.
Mike releases the hold as Stevens nearly passes out on the mat as Mike rolls away and up gingerly to his good knee as the timekeeper hands Scott Woodson the HOFC title.
Bryan McVay: The winner of this match and still the unsanctioned HOFC Champion…. MIKE BEST!!!!!
Walking over to Mike with the HOFC Title the two men again exchange stares for a moment as Woodson hands looks down at the HOFC title for a second before handing it over to Mike and helping him to his feet before raising his arm in victory.
Joe Hoffman: Another successful quote…. Unquote… defense for Mike Best of the HOFC Title as he puts Scott Stevens away and gets his redemption for ICONIC 2015.
Benny Newell: Finally we never have to hear Scott Stevens brag about his win over Mike Best. Thank fucking GOD of HOW….
You’re a Mean One Mister Grinch plays again as Mike grabs his Santa hat and puts it back on before rolling out of the ring with his HOFC Title and cautiously starts walking up the ramp trying not to put much pressure on his right leg.
Joe Hoffman: And now with that we are almost ready for our main event where…
Benny Newell: ALL THE FUCKING TITLES!!!! Those Tag belts are coming home to The eMpire where they belong.
Joe Hoffman: Well… only time will tell and we will find out soon enough in the main event here on Refueled!
97 Minute iron Man Match for the World Championship
Dan Ryan vs. Cecilworth Farthington©
LSD Championship Match
High Flyer vs. Maximillian Kael©
Austin Reeves vs. Chris Kostoff
Back live and the scene cuts backstage to Scott Stevens. He’s standing there with HOW’s Ace backstage reporter Brian Bare. He’s still sweaty and breathing heavily from his match just moments ago.
Brian Bare: So, Scott Stevens. After your match with Mike Best, you must be looking forward to ICONIC. Do you have any plans or ideas about what might be happening with you at the annual show?
Scott Stevens: Brian, that loss to Mike was tough. It showed that I need a major overhaul on what I’ve been doing as of late because what I’ve been doing hasn’t been working and I can start anew at ICONIC against a man I’m very familiar with.
Brian Bare: Who?
Scott Stevens: Steve Solex.
Brian Bare: Why him?
Scott Stevens: Because Solex and I have unfinished business just like Scottywood and I had. Solex knows I’m better than him and at ICONIC I’ll finally end the doubt once and for…….
Stevens falls stumbles forward and into the ground, nearly knocking the camera man down with him. Standing over him, is none other than Steve Solex. Solex looks down at Stevens with a smarmy smirk on his face, then looks down to the rusty, corroded, now blood stained, pipe in his right hand.
Steve Solex: I guess you didn’t get the hint, did you Stevens? You need a match at ICONIC? You got one.
Solex tosses the pipe onto Stevens and begins to put the boots to the Texan as the scene cuts elsewhere
Instead of cutting to the backstage area, the HOV comes alive, and a video begins to play….
Dun dun dun..dun dun.
Dun dun dun..dun dun.
“In the distant future of 2019 humanity has failed. The eMpire has taken all the gold of the world. Society had only one hope.. And Max defeated her for the LSD Championship. Then she disappeared in shame..”
The scene opens up to a smoke filled North Kaelrean Ring in the Best Arena parking lot camp. Max Kael can be seen standing there in his wrestling gear, his body brace glimmering in the bright spotlights that shine down on him. The modified LSD Championship was slapped over his shoulder with his hands clutching onto it tightly.
Max Kael: Hello High Octane Wrestling World it is I, the Lord Supreme Dictator Maximillian Wilhelm Kael, known coward and recently registered Maul Santa! The time has come to celebrate my favorite holiday of the year, MERRY KAELSMAS!
Soldiers clamour into the ring and throw tinsel into the air and cheer their leader enthusiastically. The blue eye of the Prime Minister of Maxopotamia fills with jolly mirth as he lifted his right arm into the air.
Max Kael: In keeping with the Great North Kaelrean Holiday I am here to share a great and wonderful gift with you all. The Gift of Truth! So buckle up, darlings, because you’re going to want to know what I know..
The soldiers around Max quickly fall into formation behind him, their celebratory expression vanishing and taking on a somber, serious tone.
Max Kael: Tonight Cecilworth Farthington and I shall take the Tag Team Championship Gold off the Industry meaning that Every. Single. Title. In High Octane Wrestling will belong to the eMpire. I will lay upon my shoulder my record setting sixth Tag Team Championship, tied with the great Mario Maurako, my absent brother in arms. This will be a testimony not only to my enduring legacy but to the Glory of the eMpire, a three man team that have brought this federation to its knees.
Tearing the LSD Championship off his shoulders he tosses it up into the air behind him as two of the soldiers catch it. Raising his arms to either side Max smirks at the camera through thin, chapped lips, metal teeth poking out at the world. The Soldiers shuffle forward, wrapping the title around his waist, securing it into place.
Max Kael: A win tonight will also mean that I will be the first HOWrestler to hit double digits in the win column. It will solidify my position at the High Octane Point System as the NUMBER ONE wrestler, by points, in High Octane Wrestling. My good friend and maybe possibly newly adopted brother, IF YOU’RE WATCHING LEE, is still High Octane Wrestlings Undefeatable ICONIC WORLD CHAMPION and I would never, in my life, want to belittle his accomplishments. No, rather, I simply want you all to know that we of the eMpire dominate in all fields that are worth a fuck. So to all you other worthless pissants who stare up at your betters, Michael, Cecilworth and Myself, you’re going to have to get.. Much, much better.
He pauses for a second as he remembers an important point.
Max Kael: Except you Darin Zion, you’re as good as you’re going to get so.. Enjoy yourself I guess?
Max shakes it off, a disgusted expression oozes over his face as a wave of nausea passed over him.
Max Kael: ..so until I see you all again later tonight.. I am your Lord Supreme Dictator.. Maximillian Wilhelm Kael.. FIRST of my NAME!
Saluting in unison the soldiers in the ring bark like well trained dogs.
Soldiers: LONG MAY HE MAIM!
The HOV goes black as we cut backstage.
Backstage in the Allstate Arena, Lindsay Troy is seen quietly speaking with Jack Harmen and Dan Ryan, just moments prior to the main event. The unit known as The Industry look intense in their discussion, going over the last minute details before what could be the most important title defense of this era of High Octane Wrestling.
Joe Hoffman: Folks, we’re just moments away from tonight’s main event contest, where the immovable object that is The Industry will come face to face with the unstoppable force… Maximilan Kael and Cecilworth Farthington. In the longstanding war between the eMpire and The Industry, tonight’s main event could prove to be one of the most important battles.
The informal huddle breaks, with LT putting a hand on each of her teammate’s shoulders. There is a visible frustration in her eyes that it isn’t going to be her out there tonight, and they acknowledge it with a simple series of nods. Nothing more seems necessary for three competitors who have known each other for a very, very long time.
Benny Newell: Can anyone say “FARTHY ALL BELTS?” They’ve only held the belts THIS long because these fucking goombas have been too busy challenging for singles championships. The eMpire is the Holy fucking Trinity, and tonight they’re walking out with EVERY FUCKING BELT THIS COMPANY HAS. Look at this little “meeting of the minds”. They’re probably planning their retirements.
Over a half century of professional wrestling greatness part ways, with Harmen and Ryan making their way out toward the curtain to make their entrances for the evening. Lindsay Troy checks her arm, testing its flexibility as she watches her teammates disappear– it’s hard to hide the concern, and annoyance, on her face.
Once the defending champions are out of sight, Lindsay turns back toward the locker room of The Industry to watch the match from the confines of the locker room.
The sickening sound of metal on bone reverberates through the hallway, as a steel pipe connects directly with the injured shoulder of Lindsay Troy. She drops like she’s been shot, and it probably feels like she has, as her assailant stands over her, taking a moment to admire their handiwork.
It’s a hooded figure, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a black sweatshirt with the hood up. The attacker drops the hood off of their head, revealing their true identity…
Joe Hoffman: What in the hell?!
El Hombre fucking Blanco.
The Mexican wrestling legend raises the pipe again, bringing it down onto the injured arm of Lindsay Troy. Once, twice, three times, before tossing the pipe aside and laying into LT with stiff boots. Very, very familiar looking boots.
Joe Hoffman: This is disgusting! Mike Best is laying WASTE to Lindsay Troy with a completely unfounded attack– this is against the sanctions of Lee Best himself! No contact between the eMpire and The Industry outside of the confines of a ring!
Benny Newell: What are you TALKING about, dickhead? That’s not Mike Best, that’s EL HOMBRE BLANCO, known Mexican wrestling legend and defeater of Eric Dane in the eWmania Big Twenty Tournament! He doesn’t even work here!
Lindsay cries out in pain, having been blindsided in an ambush with no chance to defend herself. Her attacker, who totally and definitely isn’t Mike Best in a cheap luchador mask.
Security and medical technicians bullrush the area, finally catching wind of the attack, but El Hombre Blanco simply backs away, laughing as he stares at his prey.
El Hombre Blanco: ¡Viva la Industra, puta!
Spitting on the fallen body of his adversary, the “mysterious luchador” disappears around the corner of the hallway, vanishing from view as the camera zooms in on Lindsay Troy. She holds her limp, battered arm at her side– her face is a mask of pain, as High Octane Wrestling cuts to its final commercial of the evening.
Joe Hoffman: Folks, we’re back live on HOTv, and I… I can’t believe what we’ve just seen. Michael Best just savagely attacked Lindsay Troy, moments before tonight’s main event, and I don’t know what this means for the status of the eMpire or their championships thanks to Lee Best’s mandate on the last Refueled.
Benny Newell: El Hombre Blanco is his own man who takes his own actions– plus he has diplomatic immunity. I see that in movies all the time. I don’t know WHY he chose to attack known supporter of Donald Trump Lindsay Troy, but maybe if she didn’t hate his people and want to BUILD THE WALL, this wouldn’t have happened. Leave Mike Best and the eMpire out of it.
Joe Hoffman: There is NO WAY that Lindsay Troy is a Donald Trump supporter, Benny, and I don’t like that you’re distracting from the point at hand here. The point is that Mike Be–
Benny Newell: What, she can’t vote for Trump because she’s black?
Joe Hoffman: FOR THE LAST TIME SHE IS ITALIAN.
Benny Newell: …what, Italians can’t be black now? You’re as racist as Lindsay Troy. Stop being such a fa–
Joe Hoffman: DO NOT SAY IT, BENJAMIN NEWELL.
Benny Newell: …fascist. Stop being such a fascist. Jeez.
An explosion resonates over the speakers of the Allstate Arena, drawing the attention of the fans in the crowd as the lights drop to a low, dark red hue. The sounds of the explosion fade away into the distance, replaced by the distinct voice of Admiral Akbar.
IT’S A TRAP!
As soon as the words are spoken, the eMpire Trap Remix of “The Imperial March” by John Williams begins to blast over the sound system, thudding bass and orchestral arrangements intertwined. The arena is washed over in loud, obnoxious boos as the Maximilian Kael and Cecilworth M. J. Farthington make their way out onto the stage, sauntering onto the ramp with their three collective HOW singles Championships and making their way toward the ring.
In immediate tow, a surprisingly sweaty Michael Best walks behind them wearing his ring tights and a t-shirt that reads “El Hombre Blanco Is My Favorite Wrestler”. He very much looks capable of having ditched a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants, as he drags the HOFC Championship in tow.
Joe Hoffman: Since Rumble at the Rock, the eMpire have certainly been working as a cohesive unit, using underhanded but effective tactics to retain their singles championships and keep The Industry from breaking their front lines. We saw an excellent example of that in the unwarranted attack that occurred just before this match, and now that clown is bragging about it on live television with his t-shirt.
Benny Newell: Drop it, Joe. Cecilworth is MY favorite wrestler— do you think we’re the same person too?
Joe Hoffman: You know what? We’ll let Lee Best decide. And it may not even matter– if The Industry are victorious here tonight, they’ll not only retain their championships, but this COULD be a major turning point in momentum as we lead up to two giant title matches at ICONIC.
Benny Newell: Just call it what it is, The eMpire is the most dominate faction in professional wrestling, Joe. It’s not even close. Did you SEE the Christmas special? THEY MELTED DAN RYAN AND NOW DAN RYAN WILL NEVER BE THE SAME.
Joe Hoffman: Did… did you just say “the most dominate”? Do you mean dominant?
Benny Newell: This will be end for you, Joe. Shut your mouth.
Joe Hoffman: …
Max slithers menacingly into the ring, as Michael Best climbs up onto the apron and holds the ropes open. Cecilworth climbs the steps and ducks through the ropes, tipping his imaginary hat to best friend and manager-for-the-night Mike Best. The HOW World, ICON, LSD and Unsanctioned HOFC Championships are held aloft by the friends and stablemates before they take their corner and await the beginning of the match.
ALLLLLL ABOOOAAAAAAAARDDDDD! HA HA HA HA….
As the music of the eMpire fades from the speakers, it is replaced with opening riffs “Crazy Train”, followed by a fade in to “Zero” by the Smashing Pumpkins. The lights go out and a dual-spotlight makes an encircling pattern on the entrance area.
Joe Hoffman: Here we go, folks. No matter how many sneak attacks the eMpire makes, no matter how many matches they skate by with a victory, at the end of the day they WILL answer to The Industry. Dan Ryan and High Flyer are here to send a message tonight, and if I was one of their opponents, I’d be listening very, very carefully.
Benny Newell: Yeah sure, maybe if they speak caveman and half wit. I’m surprised they let High Flyer out of that straight jacket last week– I’d have had that moron committed. He threatened to stab three men in cold blood, Joe. CUTTO: JACK HARMEN IN JAIL FOREVER.
Dan Ryan steps out from behind the curtain, lifting the sunglasses off his eyes and looking out into the crowd as walks intently down the ramp, pyro blasting off behind him with the HOW Tag Team Championship around his waist. Running out from behind, “High Flyer” Jack Harmen hops into the second spotlight with nearly perfect timing, holding his half of the HOW Tag Titles over his head with high energy as both members of The Industry begin to make their way intently down to the ring.
Joe Hoffman: Make all the jokes you like, Benny. Dan Ryan is a human assassin when it’s just business, and if one thing is becoming clearer and clearer by the week, it’s that this is becoming very personal for The Industry. We’ve heard talk about families. About injuries. About brutal violence, and while it’s all leading to ICONIC, I have a feeling we’re going to get a very dangerous preview here tonight.
Benny Newell: More dangerous than a knife wielding mech-ninja with kangaroo legs and an emo Ken doll haircut? Is that even legal? Look, I get it, your job is to hype things up, but this is just basic math. Three losses in a year. Dan’s failed to beat Farthington the same number of times that the entire eMpire has lost in 2019. Call them the LINDUSTRY, Joe– tonight’s they’re taking an L.
Joe Hoffman: Jack Harmen had Cecilworth Farthington dead to rights on the last Refueled, in the middle of the ring. He’d be the HOW World Champion right now, if it weren’t for the interference of Max Kael and Mike Best. The same can be said for Lindsay Troy.
Benny Newell: Yeah, and if I was a Texan, I’d fuck my sister– you wanna keep playing hypotheticals, or do you wanna focus on reality?
High Flyer slides into the ring under the ropes, kicking up to his feet and going up onto one turnbuckle as Dan rolls in under the bottom rope and climbs the other. Instead of looking out at the crowd, though, both champions have their eyes locked on Michael Best, who is an unwelcome addition to ringside tonight.
Referee Matt Boettcher takes the Tag Team Championships from Harmen and Dan, who take their respective corner. He holds them aloft, signifying that the match is for the titles. Both teams determine who will be legal first– as soon as Dan Ryan has been designated the legal man for The Industry, Cecilworth immediately determines that Max Kael will be their first legal man.
DING DING DING
As soon as the bell rings, and maybe a half second before, Max Kael bursts from the corner and collides into Dan Ryan with a running elbow that was quite frankly not anticipated by big man in the Industry. Ryan is staggered back to the corner, as Kael follows up with a barrage of forearms, but the early advantage is short lived– Dan shoves Kael backward, sending him ass-over-teakettle and rolling back toward his own corner like a wounded animal.
The crowd roars, and Max immediately turns to Cecilworth for the tag. Farthington doesn’t really want it, but begrudgingly takes the tag for his unofficial blood brother in the opening moments of the match.
Joe Hoffman: A fast tag for the eMpire– Max Kael easily overpowered by the pure strength of Dan Ryan, and he doesn’t want any part of that.
Benny Newell: TACTICS, Joe. These are TACTICS.
Farthington is slow to get into the ring, as a fiery eyed Dan Ryan smiles. He’s been waiting for this since Rumble at the Rock, and the crowd is already on their feet. Farthington eventually ducks into the ring, taking a defensive stance as Dan Ryan tries to goad him into a fight.
CMF looks to the audience, who cheer even louder as he steps toward one half of the Tag Team Champions. But as soon as he gets almost within Dan’s reach, Farthington shakes his head and backs away to the turnbuckle, “conferring” with Max in the corner. The boos from the crowd are beyond audible, they are downright LOUD.
Dan Ryan doesn’t fear the HOW singles champions, as he gets angry and charges into the corner with a huge clothesline attempt. Unfortunately, Farthington manages to get out of the way, sending Dan’s face into the turnbuckle! Farthington begins to stomp at the back of the tag team champion, grabbing the ropes for leverage. As it’s both cheap and susceptible to the five count rule, Matt Boettcher warns CMF before beginning a count to disqualification.
Before the count hits five, Farthing grins and reaches out to Max Kael, tagging him into the match.
Joe Hoffman: Come on, Farthington. You’re the World freaking Champion! Show a little bit of competitive spirit!
Benny Newell: What the fuck do you think he’s doing, Joe? HE’S FUCKING COMPETING! DRINK!
Cecilworth continues to hold the ropes, stomping on Dan Ryan, as Max enters the match for the second time. Now both singles champions are stomping on their opponent in the corner, until finally Boettcher forces CMF to get out of the ring and take his spot on the apron. He does, but now Boettcher’s still got Max to deal with, and the crowd is booing even louder now as he holds the ropes, picking up where Farthington left off.
THE TAG IS MADE!
Joe Hoffman: Seriously, guys? Seriously?
Benny Newell: TAG FOR-EH-EVER, CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP.
Max Kael tags out of the match, and now it’s nearly a riot in the Allstate Arena. Jack Harmen looks visibly outraged on the apron, knowing that there is nothing he can legally do to protect his partner in this match as of yet.
Farthington hops the ropes and takes over, immediately grabbing Dan Ryan by the back of the head and shoving him neck first into the adjacent ropes, choking him out against them. Matt Boettcher wants to stop it, but still has no further recourse than the dreaded count before disqualification.
Outside of the ring, Michael Best grabs the leg of Matt Boettcher and starts yelling at him about a “fast DQ count”, sucking his attention away from the match.
Joe Hoffman: Oh come on, hasn’t he done enough tonight? Would someone get him the hell out of there?
Benny Newell: For what? He’s just expressing his discontent with the speed of the count. This is Manageering 101, Joe. Gotta maintain a fair and balanced official out there.
The booing intensifies now, until Jack Harmen climbs off the apron and starts to chase Mike Best down, having had enough of this bullshit. Now, the crowd explodes into cheers, as Michael runs away from the wildcard of The Industry!
Boettcher tries to keep the two from fighting, struggling to keep order in this match already. Michael goads Harmen, daring him to throw a punch in direct defiance of Lee Best– he tells High Flyer to go ahead and get themselves fired, and their titles stripped. Gritting his teeth, Harmen turns and slams his hands against the steel ring steps, in an absolute rage as he heads back to his side of the apron.
Sliding immediately back into the ring, Matt Boettcher really has no choice but to start the count again, but already Farthington has had a lot of extra time to lay in the choke.
THE TAG IS MADE!
Joe Hoffman: ENOUGH WITH THE TAGS!
Benny Newell: Yeah, what he said! NOT ENOUGH TAGS!
At this point, the crowd is ready to jump the guardrail and fight the eMpire themselves. Boettcher is really letting Max Kael have it, telling the eMpire that they’re nearing a DQ on sheer principle. In the meantime, Dan Ryan climbs back to his feet, sneering like a raging animal.
As soon as Max Kael is in the ring, Dan throws out a heavy handed closed fist, getting a lashing from Matt Boettcher as Max Kael stumbles backward into the ropes. Dan Ryan doesn’t appear to give a shit right now, as he shrugs Boettcher off, throwing another fist and this time being warned about a disqualification.
Benny Newell: What a fucking cheat. Disqualify him but also give the belts to the eMpire. That is what I would like to see happen right now. Because of the cheating, I mean.
Joe Hoffman: Do you even understand how completely and totally h–
Benny Newell: Yes, I know. Shut up and drink.
Max ducks a third punch, though, throwing a quick elbow that takes Dan Ryan off his balance a little bit. He throws a second elbow, and this time Dan is doubled over. Max Kael backs into the ropes, shooting off and trying for The Gaslighter, but as he leaps and completes the spin, Dan Ryan catches him! The behemoth of a man uses Max’s own momentum to slam him even HARDER down to the mat, laying him out with a picture perfect powerslam!
Maximilian Kael holds his back, writhing in pain from the powerslam as Dan Ryan drops for a cover.
Max Kael barely gets his shoulder up, but it only seems to anger Dan Ryan more as he stands back to his feet. The normally cool headed tag champ lifts Max up by the hair, practically yanking it out as he holds Kael’s face close to his own before throwing him into a neutral corner like a ragdoll. He’s using his size now, and Dan charges forward like a freight train to collide with Max in the turnbuckle! Max collapses in a heap, as the crowd roars at the turnaround in this match.
Benny Newell: NO! LIES! HACKS! MAX HAD THE HIGH GROUND!
Joe Hoffman: Dan Ryan is picking up steam, and his anger his carrying him through this match. I think this might be the most dangerous we’ve seen him yet, and it’s only intensifying.
Max scrambles to his feet, trying to make it to the corner to tag Cecilworth back in.
However, Dan Ryan grabs him by the hair once again, literally dragging Max to the corner and tagging in Harmen, bringing a fresh man into this match for the Industry! The crowd is on their feet!
Jack Harmen leaps directly over the ropes, sailing into the ring with a vicious flying kick that just about takes the LSD Champion’s head off it’s shoulders! The crowd roars it’s approval, and Max Kael hits the mat like a slab of wet, raw meat. Harmen doesn’t waste any time celebrating it, though, as he picks Max’s arm up off the canvas and leaps into the air, spinning it and slamming it back down in a punishing looking maneuver that causes Max to howl out in pain!
Joe Hoffman: And here comes Jack Harmen! The Industry is on the attack! HERE WE GO!
Benny Newell: You know what, Joe? I don’t like your blatant favoritism. It’s cute when I do it. It’s a whole thing. I cheer for the bad guys because I like the bad guys, but I don’t love how you always have to side with the goody goodies. What’s so special about them, huh? Maybe make your own decisions, you fucking boy scout.
Max rolls toward the ropes, climbing back up to his feet, only to be met by an oncoming train named High Flyer. However, Mike Best hops up onto the apron, momentarily stealing Harmen’s attention, just long enough for Kael to side step an attack!
While Boettcher deals with the interfering manager, AGAIN, Max grabs High Flyer from behind, slamming him down to the mat by his hair! The crowd groans at the impact, and Harmen is suddenly seeing stars as he lies on the canvas, holding his head in pain from the direct impact.
The LSD Champion drags Harmen to his feet, shoving him face first into the eMpire corner as he braces Jack’s forehead against the turnbuckle pad. Kael draws back a closed fist, and THWACK, connects with a throwback punch to the back of the skull that makes the audience shudder. And then another. And then… another.
Benny Newell: THE RETURN OF THE MOTHERFUCKING DONKEY PUNCH! YES YES YES!
Joe Hoffman: A vicious attack with a terrible name. Absolutely atrocious.
Max Kael tags back out of the match, bringing a still fresh Cecilworth into the fray to take over from where he left off.
CMF ducks into the ring, laying a knee into the back of a slumped over Jack Harmen, smiling with glee as the crowd boos along in stride. Farthington looks back at Dan, pointing at him with a smirk on his face, before laying in another kick to his downed opponent.
Harmen scrambles through the legs of Farthington, escaping the corner as he heads back to tag out, but the World Champion takes him out at the back of the knee, hobbling High Flyer and keeping him grounded— the crowd boos.
Joe Hoffman: There is something to be said for keeping a man called High Flyer on the ground, but I don’t approve of the way it’s being done tonight.
Benny Newell: Yeah, well, you don’t approve of anything. You’re the opposite of fun, Hoffman. You’re NUF.
Farthington drops a knee into High Flyer’s back, stretching his arms backward and holding him in a stretch hold in the middle of the ring. The crowd is roaring, angry and ready to riot as Dan yells encouragement from the apron. At ringside, Michael Lee Best grabs the HOW World Championship, bringing it to the apron and trying to slide it into the ring for his partner and best friend to use as a weapon.
Joe Hoffman: Oh come on! This is just BLATANT! Eject him from ringside, Boettcher!
Benny Newell: Eek, that IS a little blatant. Easy there, kid. You’re not the owner of this joint anymore.
Matt Boettcher is quick to scramble up the title, but Dan Ryan isn’t having any of these shenanigans this week. He jumps off the apron, towering over Michael Best and getting directly into his face, telling him that if he doesn’t get the fuck away from this ring, he’s going to be removed.
Immediately, the crowd is the loudest that they’ve been all night– the angry vein in Dan Ryan’s forehead is bulging out of control, with weeks of interference and injurious intent fresh in his mind. Michael is trying not to look afraid, instead daring Dan Ryan to break the rules and attack him outside of the confines of a ring.
Joe Hoffman: Dan, you know better than this– this is the plan! Don’t let them get to you!
Benny Newell: EMBRACE YOUR HATE AND FULFILL YOUR DESTINY, SKYWALKER!
Dan is nearly foaming at the fucking mouth, stepping toward Michael Best with malintent in his stride. The fans are torn, not sure what the fuck they want to see happen. Boettcher bails out of the ring, getting between the two men as security steps in from ringside as well, trying to keep a brawl from breaking out.
But it isn’t Dan who hits Michael Best.
It’s Cecilworth Farthington, who hits Jack Harmen.
With the HOW Tag Team Championship belt.
Joe Hoffman: No. No. No no no. Noooooo.
Benny Newell: Oh my god this is the smartest thing that they have ever done holy fucking shit.
Max Kael slides back out of the ring, having delivered the Weapon of Jack Destruction, and immediately Michael Best abandons his fight with Dan Ryan outside. He screams for Boettcher to turn around and look into the ring, where Cecilworth as Jack Harmen covered… dead to rights… in the middle of the ring.
Boettcher slides inside, completely unaware of the hoodwink, and makes the count.
Dan Ryan is through the ropes to break up the count!!!
DING DING DING
Dan Ryan is able to stop the pin, but it’s a second too late, as the history books have already been written. Actual garbage begins to fill the ring, as Max Kael ducks back inside with the other HOW Tag Team Championship, celebrating with Cecilworth Farthington as the eMpire officially now holds every championship in High Octane Wrestling.
Bryan McVay: Here are your winners… and NEWWWW HOW Tag Team Champions…. The… EMMMMMMMMMPIIIIIRRRRRREEEE!
Michael Best slides into the ring, bringing the singles championships with him in a small pile. He begins to hand them out to his stablemates, a glorious celebration taking place in the ring. The celebration, however, is short fucking lived.
Dan Ryan is a word for angry that hasn’t been invented yet.
He picks up the lone tag team championship that still lies on the mat, swinging for the fences and damned near taking the head off of Max Kael as he knocks his skull out of the fucking park. Max hits the mat so hard that the crowd isn’t sure whether to cheer or feel legitimate concern, and Michael Best and Cecilworth Farthington look at each other in a moment of panic.
Since they’re inside of the ring, technically all bets are on, and both standing eMpire members charge for Ryan in tandem. Dan takes both men down with a fiery clothesline, having now single handedly downed the entire eMpire in the span of ten seconds! The crowd is still pissed off about the result of the match, but on their feet as weeks upon weeks of injustice are about to be avenged.
Security floods the ring, with more sprinting down the ramp, but Dan Ryan isn’t going to be stopped. He grabs hold of the HOW World Champion, immediately applying a tight, dangerous looking Fujiwara armbar and really cranking back on it. Farthington screams out in pain, immediately trying to tap out on instinct.
But Dan isn’t looking for a submission, and this is no longer a match.
Joe Hoffman: Whoa, whoa! Someone has to stop this, he’s gonna break his arm! He’s sincerely going to break it! I don’t agree with the way the eMpire operates, but this can’t be allowed to happen!
Benny Newell: NOOOOO HE’S JUST BECOME FARTHY ALL BELTS! CALL THE FUCKING POLICE!
He rips back on the arm, pulling it hard enough to nearly break the fucking thing, as Michael fights to get back to his friend through the swarm of security. Max is still out cold in the ring, as security tries desperately to pull Dan and Cecilworth apart.
It takes the effort of nearly all involved in the ring, but finally Dan is assuage and releases the hold. Chest heaving, and near hate in his eyes, he stares at the fallen, half-crippled HOW World Champion as he falls to the mat, clutching his arm defensively. It is definitely injured, if not somehow a worse word than that.
The copyright symbol airs on the corner of the screen.
Refueled comes to an end.