GUY WHO DOESN’T NEED HIS WHOLE RESUME IN HIS TITLE CAUSE PEOPLE ACTUALLY UNIVERSALLY KNOW WHO HE HIS ADDRESSES ALL THIS SHIT

Jesus fucking Christ.

I go down with BIG RONA for a week and this is what’s allowed to happen? I may have resigned as CEO, but this has still been my home since 2009, so let me just address all the cowards sitting in whatever bingo hall is closest to the arena we run every week who feel safe taking pot shots and can magically post more than once in a week suddenly without imploding or physically weeping.

Sorry that one Steve Solex promo managed to draw more interest in this event than any number of nine hour radio shows were we all pull out our pieces and talk about them, but the level of butthurt being shouted from beneath Harry Potter staircases is hilarious right now. Not one of these motherfuckers is willing to step up and wrestle at PWA 2, mind you. Just let them take their shots from the sidelines and claim victory in their shitty side discords. Well, to quote my best friend and favorite HOW Hall of Famer currently slumming it in Diet HOW:

Cool.

Cecilworth, you don’t like HOW. We get it. I mean, it single handedly made you the kind of name who could walk into PRIME in the spot you’re in now, made you as good as you are today, and your time here lead to some of the coolest moments of both our careers, but hey, if the salt tastes that good, please keep dunking on the company at every available opportunity while swearing up and down that you’ll never participate in anything related to the PWA. It absolutely doesn’t look like pure, bitter, sour grapes. Promise.

Youngblood?

Lindsay is literally never going to fuck you. You don’t have to defend her honor. I get that you’re desperately clinging to the only company you could still have a main event run in in 2023, but your job is safe, bro. Just keep holding onto that Universal Championship till my SON gets his shot at your belt— I hear that’s what these former HOW guys do… they wander into PRIME after they couldn’t hack it in HOW, and then go on huge runs.

Oh, and the HOFC Championship match between El Hombre Blanco, who I am graciously allowing to defend my belt, and TAL is rescheduled for PWA 3 on account of BIG RONA. Just figured I’d put some actual news into a news post, so you can all go back to jerking eachother off about how much better you think your copycat organization is than the people who are responsible for your resurgence in the first place.

LET’S GO SOLEX.

IN DAD WE TRUST.