We here at HOTv have been sent this exclusive home video shot by HOW Hall of Famer, Frankie the Cameraman this past week. While we here at HOTv pride ourselves on only showing the best in family entertainment, we thought that the following needed to be aired due to its networthiness. As many of you know, HOW Hall of Famer Scott Woodson, aka Scottywood, kidnapped an acquaintance of fellow Hall of Famer, Bobbinette Carey. He has been missing since and police have not been able to acquire his whereabouts. This is the first footage that has surfaced since that incident. We warn you that the following is graphically explicit and is not appropriate for younger audiences.
The video opens and we see Marc, Bobbinette Carey’s possible love interest tied to a chair, a ball gag again in his mouth as we can see dried blood covering most of his face. Standing next to him are two men holding hockey sticks and wearing old school goalie masks… or “Jason” masks for you morons who have no sense of hockey history. The masks are though doing little to disguise the fact that it is Chet and Tanner standing by Marc as the two start clamoring back and forth with each other.
Chet: You think I could pick up some Parmanian snipes with this goalie mask on bro?
Tanner: Is there such a thing as a snipe here in Parma? It’s more like the garbage goal district here.
Chet: A score is a score though bro.
Tanner: True dat bro, as long as you bury the biscuit, the goal light goes off.
Chet: I bet you could even look and smell like Parma cheese and score a goal here in Parma bro.
Tanner: I think you mean Parmay Jack cheese bro.
Scottywood: It’s Parmesan cheese you idiots… and shut the fuck up! I’ve lost enough brain cells from headshots and drinking to lose anymore listening to you two fucking losers chattering on and fucking on.
We finally see Scottywood walk into the shot, holding his barbed wire hockey stick in hand as he walks up to Marc and cracks him across the jaw with the butt end of the stick to wake him up.
Scottywood: Rise and shine Marky, Mark… time to give Bobbinette another taste of the true pain she has caused with her stunts the past few months. Because I know Bob well Marc… much better than you have over what… a couple weeks?
Marc is half awake as he tries to say something, but with the ball gag in his mouth, the response is unintelligible.
Scottywood: Something like fourteen years Marc… fourteen year I have known Bobbinette. Me better than anyone can tell you that she lives in some kind of fantasy world… where the consequences of her actions just go right over her head… or right between her legs. I know that’s been your goal all along… and you’ll say or do anything to make that happen. I also know that better than anyone after hanging out with these two fucks for the last couple months.
Chet: I don’t know if we would say anything to get into a girls pants Scotty.
Tanner: Didn’t you once pretend to be the cousin of Gandhi to sleep with a Hindu girl?
Chet: Didn’t you once say you were the reincarnated spirit of a widow’s husband to sleep with her at her husband’s funeral?
Tanner: All I did was confirm I knew his birthday… which was on the picture of him right behind her…
Chet: Ok… maybe we would Scotty, carry on.
Scottywood: The point is, Bobbinette hates a lot of people… and for her to be debating feelings about you Marc… well then you must be pretty important. Not as important as beating Mike Best and winning a second HOW World Title… but enough for her to feel a sliver of my fucking pain. I’d say I’m sorry that you had to get caught up in all this… just for wanting to get your dick wet… but that would be a complete lie. I’m gonna enjoy this… almost as much as I am gonna enjoy ripping an eyeball straight from it’s socket at March to Glory. Upside for you Marc… it’ll be a new hole for you… if you’re into that.
Again there are some mumbles from Marc that Scotty leans in to try and hear… but ball gag… so yeah, he can’t understand him.
Scottywood: Remove Bob’s ball gag from his mouth… make sure you use gloves though.
Chet nods as he reaches down and picks up his hockey gloves, which he puts on before removing the ball gag from Marc’s mouth.
Marc: What the fuck dude! Seriously what the fuck?
Scottywood: Is that a no to wanting to skull fuck an eyeless Bobbinette?
Marc: I’d say you are a fucked up guy… but I feel like that is an understatement.
Marc’s bloodied face looks nervously at his kidnapper.
Scottywood: You have no fucking idea… no fucking idea of who you’re thinking of getting involved with… and no fucking idea of what I’m willing to do to you.
Scottywood circles around Marc’s chair taunting him like a Lion playing with it’s food.
Marc: Hey, you’re right, I just wanted to get some. You want me to stop seeing Bobbie… I’ll do it for like five hundred bucks. I’ll be gone, ghost her ass and never see her again.
he confesses quickly attempting to negotiate. Scotty tilts his head for a moment, not expecting that twist at all from Marc.
Scottywood: Five hundred dollars? That’s all it would take for you to walk away from her? That’s also all you’d ask for from a man who has three other men here just to torture your ass?
He motions to Chet and Tanner who seem confused and impressed by the turn of events.
Marc: So should I have asked for like five hundred and fifty dollars? I didn’t think you guys made a lot of money from wrestling. Just wanted to be reasonable. Can you untie me now?
Marc asks as he appears to be in a more pleasant mood with the confession and prospects of a pay day.
Scottywood: Fucking eh dude! Bobbinette sure knows how to fucking pick em. Do you have any idea what it meant for her to even open up to you?
Scottywood seems offended almost on her behalf at the audacity of him.
Marc: Hey, it’s not like I proposed to her… or was even her boyfriend. Plus why do you fucking care? I’d think the guy who wants to take her eyeball would be ok with me just getting my dick wet and move on. Single moms are easy pulls. I’m the head of the PTA. Having a daughter is the quickest way to get a sympathy bang.
He says with a sly look on his face proud of his accomplishments. Scottywood looks at him in disbelief.
Scottywood: I’m pissed cause I don’t wanna torture some shit fucker who is only interested in geting some “sympathy bang”.
Scottywood picks up an empty bottle and chucks it across the room.
Scottywood: Fuck! Congrats on being absolutely worthless to me now.
Scottywood sighs heavily as he motions to Chet and Tanner.
Scottywood: Chet and Tanner, dispose of this fucker for me… I need to find a new avenue to take now before the Go Home show…
He puts his hands over his eyes, sighing heavily at the unfortunate turn of events. Marc looks confused then very nervous as his smile quickly fades.
Marc: Dispose of? Hey, I’m not totally worthless. I can lie, I can take my five hundred dollars… I’ll take two hundred and fifty dollars and totally fuck with her. I can help you cause her some real pain….
He says quickly attempting to plead his case to the hardcore artist. Scottywood points to the camera. Frankie waves from behind it.
Scottywood: This is streaming live to the people at HOTv you dumbass, Bobbinette will know… she’s not as stuipd as you are. Don’t worry though, I won’t kill your shit ass… I don’t need to deal with all that. But enjoy waking up in whatever ditch my boys dump you in.
Suddenly a loud crack can be heard as Scotty drills Marc in the head with the barbed wire hockey stick once, twice, three times as Tanner tosses his hat out at Scotty as Marc’s lifeless body slumps over in the chair.
Scottywood: You can have him back Bob, but guessing I’ve ruined him for you now. Don’t worry though, I’ll have something else planned for you… see you at Refueled.
The camera feed of Scotty cuts as the iPhone this is being filmed on turns into selfie mode and we see Frankie the Cameraman. He is sans his fake eye, as we can see into the cavernous darkness that his empty eye socket.
Frankie: Can’t wait for you to join the club Carey!