Clay Byrd and Teddy Palmer Saved
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Clay Byrd and Teddy Palmer Saved

The following is an official Human Resources release on behalf of concerned parties.

Clay Byrd and Teddy Palmer Saved

The United States Coastguard responded to a man over board distress signal from the USS Octane at 10pm PST in the Pacific Ocean last night. During the show, two professional wrestlers, one Clay Byrd and Teddy Palmer were found to have gone overboard into the ocean during an altercation during their match at Refueled 63.

We spoke with Commander Betz about the incident that happened last night.

“The incident aboard the USS Octane was clearly something that went too far. Luckily for the gentlemen involved we were able to respond quickly and courageously with two aircraft to assist the USS Octane in the search and rescue mission.”

We also talked with a Seaman about his experience with the rescue operation, on condition of anonymity.

“We arrived on site and immediately went to work. We quickly located both men, who were trying to drown each other. Luckily a wave separated them. My team assisted with rescuing Mr. Byrd. After getting Mr. Byrd in the helicopter he advised us that if we also rescued Mr. Palmer on the same aircraft, he would shove him back into the ocean. That’s when the First Lieutenant called for the second aircraft.”

We asked Mr. Byrd for comment on the story.

“Yes… If they would of brought that son of a bitch on that chopper I would have pushed him back into the fuckin’ ocean.”

Mr. Palmer when approached had a brief comment on the story.