Cracking News

For release from the office of the new HOAX:

CHRISTMAS COMES EARLY!

We here at the NEW and IMPROVED HOAX would like to announce that at Refueled XLIII one of our dearly cherished, High Octane faithful in attendance will be selected at random to receive the gift of a lifetime.

We’re calling this once in a lifetime opportunity…

…The COOLEST GIFT. EVER.

He or she will receive a special, one of a kind micro micro micro micro micro micro micro microwave and a straight razor blade rumored to be made out of the same material Max Shell’s mechanical eye was born from.

That’s not even the BEST part.

ALSO included, the winner of the random drawing will receive the gifts from none other than The Grand Maestro of COOL himself, “COOL” Cool Jiles. There will also be a brief photo opportunity with the former one time LSD Champion.

If you’re one of those lucky fans who already has a ticket to the COOLEST main event in this new era, make sure you get to the Best Arena early because the drawing for these one of a kind gifts will happen LIVE, during Refueled XLIII.

Jiles had this to say to HOwrestling.com about the momentous occasion,

“I love giving back to our beloved, murderous, absolute killer fans. My only regret is whoever the lucky person is won’t get to experience The COOLEST GIFT. EVER. after the main event takes place. If so, they would’ve been able to get some quality use out of the microwave. There’s only one key for that hole, if you catch my drift. Also, I’d like to add that I think Mark Shell would be proud of me for doing this. I know how much he adored not only the fans, but also High Octane Wrestling. RIP.”

GOOD LUCK!