June 24, 2019
The monkeys here at HOWrestling.com can confirm a new signing to the roster. Details are sketchy on exactly when negotiations went down but we do have the following information via statement from the new wrestlers PR staff:
Independent wrestler, “El Crashtastico”, has announced his signing with High Octane Wrestling, and that he will wrestle under the moniker, “Crash Rodriguez”.
Crash made headlines a few months back while in the Mexican Independent Wrestling scene, for unmasking himself mid-match, and turning his back on his family’s heritage.
Crash’s father, independent Mexican luchador, “La Colision”, has been reported to have turned his back on the young Crash for, “Disrespecting the family and cultural tradition.”
We reached out to Crash for comment on his signing to the returning HOW. He responded,
“I’m the very definiton of ‘High Octane’, and I find it sickening that those pendejos over at HOW took this long to sign me. I’m the god damn future. But I’m not just the future of HOW, I’m the future of this entire industry. And to those slack-jawed, inbreds in the back that call themselves ‘wrestlers’, get ready for the fucking Crash Report”